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MENZ Issues: news and discussion about New Zealand men, fathers, family law, divorce, courts, protests, gender politics, and male health.

Sun 30th April 2006

Data Base

Filed under: General — dpex @ 6:40 pm

Hi all,

I hope the protest went well today.

I wish to create a data-base of terms and phrases the CYFSterhood have trotted out in the past.

Such phrases as ‘Codependent’, ‘passive-aggressive abuser’, ‘potentially violent,’ ‘socio-path’, ‘pornofile’, ‘alcohol dependent’, ‘alcohol abuser’, ‘feotal alcohol syndrome,’ ’emotional dependence syndrome,’ ‘can’t accept he’s a scum-sucking male syndrome’, and so on.

It would be useful if you could also include the context in which the CYFSterhood used the phrase(s) to damn you in Court. It would be doubly useful if you could include any (or the probable lack of…) any evidence substantiating the claims of the CYFSterhood.

The object of the exercise is to gather sufficient profiles which I will keep on firing at various in authority, and the media, till the last straw arrives to break the camel’s back.

And with each ‘firing’ I will be including my one simple request. Ergo, that the Family Court operates at a level of proof at least in accord with the Civil Court (about 80% of the tests used by the Criminal Court).

Thus an accusative spouse must have ‘an amount’ of proof before he/she can assert danger to a child in a way which will be acceptable to the Court, can not have a spouse removed from a home by Police until satisfactory proof is offered, and can have the FC indulge him/her with primary care-giver status until he/she has proven the other party is demonstrably unfit.

Our judicial system has worked well since the 13th Century and the institution of the Magna Carter. I see no reason why the FC should be free to operate outside the law of proof which has proven so effective for the previous 700 years.

Innocent till PROVEN guilty must be the test returned to the FC.

For these vile people to assert that it is better to hurt/destroy ten men and dozens of children, sundry grand-parents and care-givers, just in case the system misses one child who is actually in danger, is an affront to civilisation.

This is ducking-stool justice and simply must be stopped.

Only we can stop it. But we have to have the will and courage to be counted.

Please, send the data to dpex@xtra.co.nz

Lastly, one correspondent asserted that ‘many’ ex-CFYS workers are ‘ex’ because of the vileness they witnessed.

Anyone got any ideas about how we can contact a few of these abviously decent folk and get them to state what they know about the CYFSterhood?


The Prodi-gal Daughter.

Filed under: General,Law & Courts — Downunder @ 12:34 am

Prime Minister Helen Clark has been asked to intervene after an Australian court decided not to grant extradition for two Catholic clergymen to face charges of sexual abuse in New Zealand.

At the risk of poetic extravagance I have to ask Will Miss Clark, waste our capital?

Australian Justice Madgwick, said it would be “unjust or oppressive” to send the clergymen back to face trial given the differences between the two countries’ legal systems and the delay in bringing the allegations.

Ken Clearwater, manager of the Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse Trust, which has supported many of the alleged victims, has contacted Miss Clark to ask the Government to get involved, but a spokesman for Miss Clark told Christchurch’s Press newspaper Mr Clearwater’s submission had not yet been received.

While the New Zealand police are still to decide whether to appeal against the judge’s decision, the real test of credibility lies with Miss Clark.

The Australian Judiciary has treated us with the contempt we deserve, so we must look to the person whom through her own behaviour and political interference has brought the New Zealand justice system into disrepute.

If she crosses the Tasman on this one I can’t see her getting any more respect from their judiciary than she does from their airport staff.

We need to come to grips with the implications of the indictment issued against our country.

It effectively reduces us from a democracy to a regime.

Sat 29th April 2006

Al Qaeda offered new base in NZ

Filed under: General — triassic @ 8:44 pm

????? ?? ???? ?? ??? ?? ????
Open letter to Osama Bin Laden

Are you aware Osama that 9/11 took out only a couple of thousand people? Should you wish to destroy the West may I suggest you come for a fact finding mission in God’s Own, New Zealand. Without the use of overt violence the feminist industry here has nearly managed to destroy family life as we once knew it. Three hundred thousand children suffer every day due to feminist terrorism. This unnecessary situation then infects the parents, grandparents and so on. You will find that the State here will give you assistance in your quest to destroy so long as you endevour to show that all is done to ensure gender and social equality. As with Marxism, the ends justify the means and I know this is how you operate. Feminist philosophy started in the USA but has been refined here in NZ.

At risk of offending you I have to say that it was not you that started terrorism of the modern era but Fattah back in Munich 1972. They lost the prestige and it was past over to you due to the USA redefining terrorism to suit their latest political aims.

Osama, unless you keep up with this new form of terrorism you will soon lose your mantle. Should you wish to take up my offer and perhaps immigrate here, may I suggest you first visit as a female and during your 3 month visitors visa shack up with some dumb ass guy, and get into an argument with him ( perhaps over why you wont let him shag you) Then ring the police ( don’t panic as once you speak with a high pitch plea and sob a bit they will kill for you) you don’t need to mutilate your self just say he has beaten you up and you will have permanent residency before you can say….Fuck me, Mohammad is this for real???

Your future will be bright here as wel. Due to Christianity failing to keep the nuclear family intact I predict Islam will dominate one day, even if it’s just to have Cat Stevens sing “Father & Son”

Yours in Mohammad

Straw & Broken Camels

Filed under: General — dpex @ 6:57 am

The only way of determining that sufficient straw has been loaded on to cause the camel’s back to break is when the camel’s back breaks.

Before that, one needs to maintain the determination to just keep on loading the straw. In other words, each protest, each letter to some authority, each phone-call of protest, every comment made to any third-party is, in its own way, just a bit more straw.

Sooner or later the camel’s back will break.:–))

More straw.

The Ombudsman has acknowledged receipt of several intensely poignant CYFSterhood-victim’s stories I have and has, as a result, undertaken to ask some searching questions of the head of The Evil Empire.


Sharing gives freedom

Filed under: General — Julie @ 1:24 am

Last Friday night I sat with some friends who know me well and told them how I had shared my story and to around 400 people. (Why do anything small?) It seems that after posting my story, I seem to have an extra spring in my step and I am more focused on life in general.Why is this? Well, basically I have been living a double life so to speak.

Friends, neighbours, people I work with and for, etc have no idea what happened to my family and that is because I felt so ashamed and embarrassed. How could this happen to me? What would others think? Who could possibly understand let alone believe me?

But while hiding this I had to make up something. This caused me pain because I didn’t want to lie to these people that I liked and needed. What if they one day found out I lied? How could they trust me? So instead I shared as little as possible about my family and talk about something else. I was basically functioning physically but emotionally a mess.

We can talk about the cost of money that is paid to lawyers which is important but it is not the only costs. These custody battles affect our thoughts and emotions and we can’t properly concentrate on our jobs or we just don’t seem to connect to life and people as we had. We don’t sleep well and of course we try to take the pain away through liquor or medication. Anxiety and stress take over.

Oh, the insanity.

But getting back to my point. Today, tomorrow and the next day I intend to hold my head up high and be real about myself to everyone because I realise it isn’t and wasn’t me but the system. And not only that but heaps of others are going through or have gone through the same thing.

It is still sinking in that in the year 2006 our leaders are destroying our families and the law which is supposed to protect us is harming us and our innocent children.

Fri 28th April 2006

Sugar & Spice and not nice Bullies

Filed under: General — triassic @ 1:37 pm

Bullies in the work place have alway been see as male. Here is evidence that the tyrants have no gender boundries.


Thu 27th April 2006

Campbell Live Story Domestic Violence

Filed under: Domestic Violence — JohnPotter @ 10:52 am

Can you please help? URGENT.

We are doing a story on men who are physically assaulted by their female partners, a story that is rarely told. We are looking to talk with a woman who is a reformed husband abuser to talk with John Campbell regarding her experiences and what she did to help herself.

The aim of this story is to help men who are victims of domestic violence, as well as the women who abuse, who need help. Can hide identity if needed.

Please call Solina on 021 897 815 / stheron@tv3.co.nz

Letter from Gwynn

Filed under: General — JohnPotter @ 10:11 am

Gwynn writes:

Dear John,

It saddens me to see that your website is devoted entirely to the rights of fathers who have been separated from their children by the family court.

I am a mum and have been separated from my children also by way of the family court because of the ‘status quo’ that you will be familiar with.

I wonder if you will ever see that the family court is so far out there with its views and it can be either a dad or a mum that can suffer EXACTLY the same fate through FC.

Ok thanks.

Guess I’ll start a non-gender support group against the injustices of the FC myself!

Anyone who has spent time reading the very numerous pages on this web site will find that there is actually very little about the “rights of fathers”. Copy and paste this phrase (with quotes) into the search field on the top right of this page and see for yourself.

If you search on “fathers rights” you will find a few more references, among them the June/July 2001 MENZ Issues, which has an article Spinning the Feminist Line detailing how the phrase “fathers rights” is largely an invention of radical feminist activists, and used to discredit fathers’ groups and individual fathers receiving support from them.

There have been a few groups who have been interested in father’s or men’s rights, but the vast majority of MENZ contributors and readers would say they are primarily interested in children’s rights.

Examination of the Family Court protest photo above the article, or most of the hundreds of other protest photos on this site will show that woman have always been involved with this movement. Woman have always attended fathers group meetings, and taken part in management of organisations.

I suggest Gwynn, that you make contact with the fathers’ group nearest you and see what kind of reception you get. My guess is that you will find that your “non-gender support group” already exists. Perhaps you might like to report back here?

Wed 26th April 2006

Surprise. Surprise

Filed under: General — dpex @ 6:32 pm

A while ago I put my case to Ruth Dyson (Min of the CYFSterhood).

I showed, quite clearly, in my posit, that the CYFSterhood had simply created an opinion on my fitness to be a care-giver, and then went about digging up as much trash as they could to support thier opinion.

And that included a speeding ticket I got in 1989! And, that I have a firearms licence. See? It all just goes to show that I’m a speedy little bastard with guns ready to blaze away.

Today, I received Dyson’s reply.

All she has done is contact the CYFSterhood, got a repeat of the crap they have put before the court, and arrived at the conclusion that they are clearly quite right! Of course they are. They’ll all sisters, aren’t they. And it is their duty to drown as many of us predatory men as possible.

So what is it, precisely, we pay these parliamentry clowns to do?

Dealing with these people (and I use the term cautiously) is kind’ve like being in a court where the bench is staffed by wolves sitting in judgement on the fate of the Rabbit.

‘Off with his head!’

I see another contributor has mentioned the scandalous practices of the Catholic Church during the Inquisition.

On that subject, here’s a funny. The Catholic Church still have a list of penance payments for wayward priests. To see more, and get totally outraged I recommend you visit the site of luigicascioli.com and read all about it.

But isn’t that exactly what we men are dealing with here in NZ? The ducking-stool justice system. If he lives he’s a scumbag. If he drowns he was probably a scumbag who just couldn’t breathe underwater.

Has anyone ever considered or actually contacted Grey Power for support?

I bet there must be an awful lot of seriously unhappy grandparents out there. Maybe it’s a source of support for us.

If nobody has made the approach then maybe I will.


Canadian Father On Hunger Strike In Front of Parliament

Filed under: General — Intrepid @ 11:54 am

Canadian Father on Hunger Strike
(From Our Friends in the US with Glenn Sacks)

Canadian father Gerry Nicolas is now on his 9th day of hunger strike in front of the Quebec Provincial Court of Justice in Gatineau. Nicolas has a six year-old boy and a four year-old girl. He only gets every other weekend “visitation,” and says his ex-wife often interferes or eliminates even that. He says that at one point he went three months without seeing his children because of her interference. The police (of course) refuse to enforce the order.

Nicolas also says his children are being alienated from him. Nicolas is black, his ex-wife is Asian, and Nicolas claims his four year-old daughter told him her mother told her not to kiss him “because he’s black.”

Nicolas says he and his ex-wife both earn around $60 or $65 thousand dollars a year, but that he has lost his business and his savings and after his wages are garnisheed he is left with less than $300 a month to live on. He says he has been unable to get a court to resolve these issues, and is on hunger strike to try to force the court to give him a hearing.

I called Gerry yesterday, and he seems very sincere and determined. I’m not sure that a hunger strike is the best tactic–I prefer the bridge and rooftop protests of Fathers 4 Justice–but I support him in what he’s doing. To contact Gerry and give him encouragement, call him on his cell phone at 00 1 (819) 921-1877. His email, which his sister is retrieving and printing out for him, is GeraldNicolas1@yahoo.ca.

Domestic Violence.

Filed under: Domestic Violence,General — Downunder @ 10:13 am

Teletext Again – Domestic Violence Campaigners told a hui in Hamilton this weekend that Judges and Lawyers were not using the domestic violence act the way it was intended. The court was failing battered women. This is wonderful progress, the court must no longer be failing men and children as well, and all this while the psychologists still argue whether it is a duck or a rabbit. Confused: you may need to watch soap. In the meantime does any know what the rules for the game really are? Well, if anyone’s got a copy of the new rules please post them here so we all play by our own interpretation.

Tue 25th April 2006

Escape from Freedom.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 11:35 pm

Freedom is a wonderful place. Many pursue it, whether it is freedom itself, or whether it is a specific freedom: Political, intellectual, cultural, religious, spiritual, sexual, however with personal freedom comes personal responsibility, something many would rather not have.

Within the confines of a social contract we agree to sacrifice that degree of freedom which we accept is irresponsible. Our laws should reflect that boundary that differentiates between responsible and irresponsible.

Society in this respect becomes a security that many willingly trade their freedom for. It is far easier to be a prisoner of the world than a child of the universe, far easier to be held responsible by society, than to be responsible for yourself. At this point we must exercise caution, if we absolve that responsibility it must be to a leadership that respects our trust and seeks our acceptance, not to one that abuses our fears and takes advantage of anyone’s ignorance.

Is it the vain dream of one man in every language that there may be a number among us that would sacrifice self interest for the mantle of leadership, to preserve the integrity of society, and perhaps the peace of the world.

“The Devils” & “The Police”

Filed under: General — triassic @ 8:03 pm

Juxtapose if you will the actions of dealing with the domestic violence industry by the police and courts today and in the movie “The Devils”, directed by Ken Russell in 1971. It is set in the Middle Ages when the church and state were one. The movie had a tremendous impact on me because of its ability to expose the abuse of power.

Cardinal Richelieu and his power-hungry entourage seek to take control of pre-renaissance France, but need to destroy Father Grandier – the priest who runs the fortified town that prevents them from exerting total control. So they seek to destroy him by setting him up as a warlock in control of a devil-possessed nunnery, the mother superior of which is sexually obsessed by him. A mad witch-hunter is brought in to gather evidence against the priest, ready for the big trial.

The ignorance of the general public and the shrewd conniving cunning of those up the chain of command were evil personified. Owing to the churches control over the general public, (all media) what ever the Cardinal deemed as evil was evil. Demons were to be found everywhere, particularly if they could be utilised to cover truth so the Cardinal could pervert justice. (sound familiar?) Sometimes, as a temporary measure, they would tie rocks to the suspects take them out onto a lake and ask God to not let them sink if they were innocent. (ever had an Exparte order slapped on you and been thrown out of your home, then, when you react to injustice have the state tell you that indeed you do have an anger problem?) The state employees of this evil regime acted as they were told. It was a good thing they did, they thought. The devil was being dealt to and they were eradicating evil. (Don’t expect Police in NZ to see your point of view because they must carry out their duties. They are just ignorant foot soldiers who see themselves as doing a good thing)

The sexual orgy that eventuates amongst the Nuns at the climax of the movie reminds me of how it must be at a ‘Woman’s Affairs’ end of year party when they count up the number of men’s lives they have fucked up. “Sure a few kids have been stung but at least we fucked those men over.”

The answer then was to not let religion and the state be as one. The answer now is to not let feminism and the state be as one.

In 1973 when I saw this movie I felt so bloody lucky not to have lived in those times…….. Down stream in generations to come men will look back at this time and say… Why in Gods name did men have children, were they all masochists?

Mon 24th April 2006

ANZAC; why I wouldn’t die for this Counrty.

Filed under: General — triassic @ 7:42 pm

Police are on the front line when it comes to dealing with volatility in relationships so one would think that they would be given special training with regards to inflaming situations by making decisions that lack any intelligence.

This appears however, not to be the case. I have found that whilst the police do not have the power to convict they do have the power to abuse their position. Driven by bigotry and prejudice they can make your life a misery. They know that putting you into the system, by laying charges , is going to cost you money and stress over a considerable length of time. Without any evidence and in a situation where it is evident that a complainant has been involved in previous false allegations against me, a police woman, Constable Low from the Manurewa Enquiry Section, proceeded to charge me with threatening to Injure.


Sun 23rd April 2006

Bully Boys and Bully Girls.

Filed under: Boys / Youth / Education,General,Law & Courts — Downunder @ 11:46 pm

There is bullying in schools now, there was when we I was a child too, that hasn’t changed. What I have learnt in life though, is that there are bully’s in the workplace, in business, in government departments, in politics, and even in the justice system. If I have seen a fundamental change in the last 30 years, it is that the bully used to lose, but now the bully wins.

It is not the bully that has changed it is us!

Boys are the new girls

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 11:00 pm

Stuff Article by By MICHAEL LAWS


Boys are the new girls

extract: Now we are the spent gender. Reduced to recycling Russian brides, watching sport and wondering where it all went wrong. Eschewed by a smarter, sassier sister who proves that she can do anything, including us. For a male these are indeed desperate and dangerous times.

State of Injustice.

Filed under: General,Law & Courts — Downunder @ 10:27 pm

I found this on Teletex.

A real slap in the face for the New Zealand Justice system has been dished out by the Australian Federal court when it overturned extradition warrants for two ex pats who had been sought on charges of historic sexual allegations.

The reasons for the decision — there are fundamental differences in the New Zealand justice system which meant these men wouldn’t get a fair trial.

So the world is watching after all!

Sat 22nd April 2006

Seeking advice for obtaining formalised 50:50 child sharing

Filed under: Law & Courts — James @ 5:50 pm

While new to this site, after entering the world as a newly separated Dad or 2, the impression I have gained from my brief reading suggests that various processes and systems allow women (at times seemingly wrongly and perhaps manipulatively) to remove children from the grasp of their father. While I am currently in current good standing, after years of hands on fathering, I am fearful for being gripped and pulled from my informal 50:50 child sharing arrangement by the “DV” opportunities, which seeminly could be invoked after unsupportive DV evidence is presented.

While every situation is different, I am wondering if there are recomendations for:
1. Best formalising 50:50 access and/or
2. De risking the chances of a loose DV case being thrown at oneself.

Any Gamblers Here

Filed under: General — dpex @ 7:20 am

Anybody will to take me up on a bet that Dr Joan has no children and has never been separated?

“Leading US clinical psychologist Dr Joan Kelly, who is a world expert in children’s adjustment to separation, told the conference………….”

“Dr Fred Seymour, who has been running the North Shore programme, said the goal was to encourage parents to make their children their priority and minimise the impact of their separation on their children.”

Perhaps Dr Fred could lso encourage CYFS to stop looking under every pebble in their desparate search for any clue the fathers are abusive.


Fri 21st April 2006

The Naked Truth

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 10:44 pm

It is time for New Zealand Society to make a critical decision.

This is a decision that will save both our adults and our children so much of the current heartache and abuse we are dealing with.

The best way to describe this situation is to understand the final destination of those who make a great contribution to the leadership and direction of our society.

Let’s look at a society as they see it with almost totally female makeup, with a few gay guys contributing to a sperm bank. In order to maintain a population it requires 50% of the females to have two children,(the child bearers), and that leaves the other 50% of the females free to do work, (the workers). Being a gay man is a privileged and respected position.

This society has a complete separation between human reproduction and sexual gratification.

In terms of reproduction a female obtains a pregnancy by sperm donation, with no physical interaction with a male. Technical manipulation allows for the guaranteed female male ratio.

In terms of sexual gratification, which is as much a state of mind as a natural biological inclination, females are raised to expect to get their jolly’s from other females, and gay men likewise from other men.

Gender interaction is a frowned upon, an unacceptable aberration.

What we have here is a gynaecocracy in the making, with heterosexual people desperately fighting for their families.

I think it is important to understand not only what we are fighting against, but how many people are actually involved in the creation of this society. Unfortunately there is no compatible outcome here; it is two extremes with some people in the middle fighting for this mythical equality.

Child abuse as we see it is a consequence of a much more diverse political atmosphere than we take into account. Because we don’t think like this we live in a vacuum of our own values, socialisation and experiences.

If you understand this you will look at social policy, law making, and behaviour in a totally different way.

Now there’s something for you to think about. Do I stay or do I go?

How Low Will the State Let Women Blow? ( It Seems There is No Limit)

Filed under: General — Intrepid @ 9:37 pm

CHICAGO (AP) – An appeals court said a man can press a claim for emotional distress after learning a former lover had used his sperm to have a baby. But he can’t claim theft, the ruling said, because the sperm were hers to keep.

The ruling Wednesday by the Illinois Appellate Court sends Dr. Richard O. Phillips’ distress case back to trial court.

Phillips accuses Dr. Sharon Irons of a “calculated, profound personal betrayal” after their affair six years ago, saying she secretly kept semen after they had oral sex, then used it to get pregnant.

He said he didn’t find out about the child for nearly two years, when Irons filed a paternity lawsuit. DNA tests confirmed Phillips was the father, the court papers state.

Phillips was ordered to pay about $800 a month in child support, said Irons’ attorney, Enrico Mirabelli.

Phillips sued Irons, claiming he has had trouble sleeping and eating and has been haunted by “feelings of being trapped in a nightmare,” court papers state.

Irons responded that her alleged actions weren’t “truly extreme and outrageous” and that Phillips’ pain wasn’t bad enough to merit a lawsuit. The circuit court agreed and dismissed Phillips’ lawsuit in 2003.

But the higher court ruled that, if Phillips’ story is true, Irons “deceitfully engaged in sexual acts, which no reasonable person would expect could result in pregnancy, to use plaintiff’s sperm in an unorthodox, unanticipated manner yielding extreme consequences.”

The judges backed the lower court decision to dismiss the fraud and theft claims, agreeing with Irons that she didn’t steal the sperm.

“She asserts that when plaintiff ‘delivered’ his sperm, it was a gift — an absolute and irrevocable transfer of title to property from a donor to a donee,” the decision said. “There was no agreement that the original deposit would be returned upon request.”

Phillips is representing himself in the case. He could not be reached for comment Thursday.

“There’s a 5-year-old child here,” Mirabelli said. “Imagine how a child feels when your father says he feels emotionally damaged by your birth.”


Filed under: General,Law & Courts — Downunder @ 11:17 am

If you have just read Peters Comment, in the previous post “Signs of Change”

1. Feminazis are responsible for this tragedy and Miss Clark should be hung for endorsing child abuse. My advice to men get the hell out of this cess pit country as the childless bitch PM and her dumb arse cronies have destroyed this country and made it one of the most dangerous places in the world for vulnerable children and heartbroken Fathers. The silent media have blood on their vile hands too!!!
Comment by Peter Burns – Thu 20th April 2006 @ 8:56 am

You might be making judgements based simply on what he said, without asking yourself how he ended up in this space, who actually dealt with him along the way. It has been not only my experience but my observation that a single act of duplicity can leave Fathers feeling, isolated, betrayed by society, and trapped between loss and lack of accountability, unable to undo the damage that has been done, by other people who have the power to be as unprofessional as they choose to be on the day.

If the North and South article “Our Shame” reminds me of anything it is their previous attempt to undo the myth of failure, in their article “Family Court of Injustice” Reality is that the public just simply doesn’t believe that this is happening. It is just too absurd to be true. It can’t be true if you do not see anyone being held accountable for their behaviour.

I’ve have helped a few Fathers to climb over the wall of deceit and unprofessionalism.
(If that is a new concept them I would intend it to mean a group of people that never allow any of their number to be held to account, so their level of professionalism devolves to the lowest denominator.) In one particular case, where a counsel for child had misled the court, he wouldn’t even show up on the day of the hearing. In fact he had the mother’s solicitor lie to the court and state that he was in another part of Auckland. I knew damn well he would be in the Judges Chambers. I had been a McKenzie friend that day, and I got out of the court room just in time to see the coward, scurry off the bottom of the stairs and out the door of the Manukau Court House.

The Judge in this case Judge Adams, features as a speaker on issues for children in the NZ family Court, Novatel Saturday 22nd April. It wouldn’t surprise me if there was a protest outside. This piece of dirty legal laundry was appointed a family court Judge in 1995, and has since been promoted to administrative Judge for the Northern Region.

It wouldn’t surprise me if the father was a protestor there, because Judge Adams made damn sure this case got buried, and banned the father from further proceedings. He still doesn’t see his children.

There is nothing that would bring you to tears quicker than a dead child, but reality is for every one of those dead children, there are a thousand abused by the State.

Says It All???

Filed under: General — dpex @ 8:50 am

The following is an excerpt from this morning’s Herald.

Ms Wiseman-Dare, who was not part of that group, said she felt the not-guilty verdicts sent the wrong message to rape victims, and could discourage possible complainants from going to police in future.

And what is the wrong message? Obviously, Ms Wiseman-Dare believes that all alleged rapists must be guilty otherwise the complainant wouldn’t have complained!!!!

Jesus H Christ! The madness gets worse.


Wed 19th April 2006

Signs of change?

Filed under: Domestic Violence,General,Sex Abuse / CYF — PaulM @ 2:27 am

Reading an article in the current (May) issue of North & South magazine I see some possible signs of change in the thinking that drives NZ social policy. The author of “Our Shame”, as many magazine writers have done before, has set out to (in her words) “traverse the grim statistics of child abuse, neglect, and killings” in this country.

What’s different about this article is that it also traverses a fundamental change that appears to be taking place in thinking at CYFS and amongst some other key players.

Some excerpts:

Dorothy Scott, Director of the Australian Centre for Child Protection says current state-run child-protection systems aren’t working and are:

“unsustainable and harmful to children and their families.” Scott says overloaded agencies such as CYFS, forced to resort to coercive heavy handedness, often further hurt the children they are trying to protect.

Ian Hassall, a former Childrens’s Commissioner and now a department head at Auckland University of Technology says:

“Two decades and a cascade of reviews have demonstrated that increasing coercion on the part of the state (in removing children from their families) has not worked.”

Sanely and refreshingly, Lesley Max a ‘social entrepreneur’ and founder of ‘HIPPY’ — Home Interaction Programme for Parents and Youngsters — dares to talk about sole parenthood as a “damaging pathway” and a major factor leading to child neglect and abuse.

“The current wisdom in New Zealand is, says Max, that it is how families relate to each other, not how they are structured that’s the problem. In other words it’s not politically correct to focus on sole parenthood.”

Lesley Max suggests:

“a public health promotion” along the lines of the seatbelts, anti-smoking, anti-junk food, anti drink-drive campaigns.”

Unfortunately the article is overall rather incoherent in the range of ideas it puts forward as solutions. Although sole-parenting is named as a risk factor, the obvious need to restore the role of fathers in parenting and in preventing child abuse gets no direct mention. Much of the article reads like a press release from a couple of organizations seeking to expand their empires and gain a bigger slice of government funding.

However it’s clear from what some of the movers and shakers are quoted as saying, that there is an increasing acknowledgement that whatever the state has supposedly been doing to protect children has not been working.

Tue 18th April 2006

The Seven Year Report.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 10:23 am

Having been involved in what is invariably labelled the men’s movement or the Fathers rights movement since 1999, I have reached some conclusions which without this forum, (thanks JohnP), I would have difficulty sharing. These titles are a political convenience for the purpose of accusations and attacks, to antagonise political dissidence. In most cases the men I have encountered walking these corridors have done so for no reason other than the love of their children. The occasional small and allegedly potent force which rises amongst us is humoured with small successes, which serve as a self perpetuating form of propaganda.

Along the way I acquired the label “the moderate face of the men’s movement”. It is not one I either pursued of cherish, simply a consequence of my inclination to want to know why. (So Mr Zorab, spare me the indignity.) I hope of recent I have dispelled that myth – it is not a bed I wish to die in.

While in some minds it may have been a futile exercise, my participation has at least been an act of integrity, something which those who have opposed both our participation and our contribution, have no claim to, and are happy to live without.

For all the energy, behind our contributions, whether it has been protestations of various forms, submissions to government, pleas to MP’s or applications to courts, some may be content with their individual outcome, but collectively we have no claim to any progress or to having improved the welfare of children or the standard of law in our country.

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