MENZ Issues: news and discussion about New Zealand men, fathers, family law, divorce, courts, protests, gender politics, and male health.

The Real World

The Fantasy World

Here is a man who has been found guilty of committing a series of horrific sexual abuse crimes against children

in Family Court, you can have an unproven allegation of child sexual abuse, even the merest suggestion of inappropriate behaviour, levelled against you

Police are inevitably involved.

Police don’t have to be involved. Formal charges don’t have to be laid

There is proven substance to his charges.

There doesn’t have to be any proven substance to your charges; Not even the merest shred of real evidence

His charges can only cover past activity.

Your charges can also cover possible future activity.

Elements of evidence can be ruled inadmissible, usually on matters of law, at the judge’s sole discretion.

Any element of evidence can be ruled admissible, regardless of law, at the judge’s sole discretion.

His past criminal conduct is not admissible if it “does no more than show a propensity to commit a crime”.

Any misdemeanour you may have committed in the past, no matter how irrelevant can be introduced as evidence against you.

For example driving charges.

Only evidence relevant to his charges can be tabled.

Your charges can incorporate other unsavoury behaviour, though no crime in itself.

For example having ever made comments or jokes of a sexual nature.

These could have occurred anywhere up to twenty years earlier (or more)!

They can rely on hearsay and innuendo

You may also be held to account for any ‘family history’ of sexual abuse you may have, for example any sexual abuse you yourself ever suffered

If ‘sexual’ charges don’t stick, then alternative charges of abusive or violent behaviour can be raised.

Emotional abuse is becoming a favourite, as almost every personal interaction can be considered emotionally abusive. The same criteria apply as for sexual charges

He had the right to be present during the presenting of all evidence

Some ‘evidence’ can be presented not only without you present, but without you even knowing!

He had the option of selecting a trial by jury

You have no option of selecting a trial by jury

His defence can include multiple lawyers.

You can only have one lawyer present.

His family have a right to be present, except during suppressed evidence.

Your family can be present only with mutual consent with your accuser.

He can have any number of support people present, except during suppressed evidence.

You can have one support person present.

Real evidence will have been presented and accepted by a jury of twelve peers

The charges have been proven beyond reasonable doubt

The charges don’t have to be proven beyond reasonable doubt

Most likely his victims were essentially picked at random from those with whom he had sufficient contact and opportunity

Your presumed victims will be out of a specified group of between one and say 3 or 4 children

This could have been anywhere up to a select few out of a hundred of more children, (if we’re all honest, we probably all have close contact with at least that number of children, through wider family, friends, neighbours etc)

No consideration or reference is made to other children with whom you have close contact. You’re not deemed a risk to them

Most likely, his victims were not his own children, but children to whom he almost certainly had no biological, and possibly also no psychological, attachment bond

Your ‘victims’ will almost certainly be related to you – your direct offspring, to whom you have a biological, and probably also a psychological, attachment bond

He probably never had any parenting involvement with his victims.

You will have had active parenting involvement with your ‘victims’.

CYFs are unlikely to be involved

CYFs may or may not have been involved

The victims will have given some evidence (probably video evidence), and probably have been medically examined

Your ‘victims’ don’t have to give evidence, nor be medically examined

Victim-Impact statements may be presented in Court before sentencing

It is unlikely your ‘victims’ will have any say in sentencing, once your guilt has been established

This includes any victim impact assessment that imminent fatherlessness will have on them.

His victims will have copious support services and counselling at their disposal.

Your ‘victims’ will have their mothers, your accuser, and perhaps The Sisterhood, notably CYFs and
Women’s Refuge.

His victims will have an ongoing relationship with their fathers.

Your ‘victims’ will be lucky to have any relationship (via Supervised Contact) with their father.

Clearly he may well have had other victims that have not been identified

It is unlikely that other victims will be suggested.

He was adjudged guilty repeatedly for sexual crimes against multiple children,

You may be found guilty of somehow intending to commit sexual crimes against a specified group of children.

He has been sentenced to (a total of) ten years’ jail

At least you won’t get sentenced to jail, the only glimmer of light in this entire resume!

He has now been sentenced to ten years supervision.

You may be sentenced to up to eighteen year’s supervision, not being alone with those specified children.

His supervision will probably not prevent him from seeing any member of his family he so desires to see (or wants to see him).

You may be sentenced to not even seeing those specified children, members of your family, during those up to eighteen years

He is sentenced to not be alone with children, any children, during those ten years.

You are of course free to be alone with any other children, including any further children you pro-create. Just not your ‘victims’.

He probably won’t see his victims again.

You will probably lose your parental relationship with your ‘victims’ altogether, not seeing them again.

They probably won’t want to see him anyway, nor he, them.

Your ‘victims’ will probably still want to see you, and you, them, but are legally barred from doing so.

He has not been violent, so no Domestic Protection Order is required.

You may be sentenced subject to a Domestic Protection Order.

He was probably sentenced to undertake a risk assessment to gauge the level of risk he poses children.

You may be sentenced to undertake a risk assessment to gauge the level of risk you pose to those specified children.

He won’t be ordered to undertake a ‘Living Without Violence’ programme

You may be sentenced to undertake a ‘Living Without Violence’ programme, whether or not you are proven to have offended.

He can’t be ordered to under an appropriate rehabilitation programme for sexual offenders, as he doesn’t accept his
offending.

You may be sentenced to undertake the same rehabilitation programme for sexual offenders that our convicted criminal above should attend, whether or not you are known to have offended, and whether or not those crimes are in fact ‘sexual’.

As a key outcome of the latter, you will be coerced into agreeing a ‘Safety Plan’ wherein you agree you’ll never be alone with children again.

He can not be tried again for the same crimes

If you initiate repeat Family Court proceedings, for example to obtain enhanced or unsupervised Contact with your children, you will be tried again for the same crimes that you were previously tried for, that you have already been found guilty of.

He appears to have a deliberate and self-realised sexual orientation towards children

Your sexual orientation is clearly towards adults, given you have clearly (a) lived intimately with one, and (b) procreated children as a result

He is still deemed to be a “high risk”.

You need only be assessed as “a risk”.

The state will cover the full cost of his supervision

You will have to cover the full cost of your own supervision

He won’t have been sentenced to leave his family home.

You may be sentenced to leave your family home.

Any assets he has, or had at the time of his offending are his to keep

You will probably have to share all your assets 50/50 with your former partner.

Your former partner could be awarded a greater share of your assets, for the benefit of her now raising your children alone

You may have to sell your major assets to enable settlement

His defence was probably funded by Legal Aid.

You will have to fund your defence.

I’m guessing, but if his defence was covered by legal aid, it will probably have been written off as unrecoverable

He will have a criminal record, which is not covered by the Clean Slate bill

You won’t have a criminal record

But if Police or CYFs are involved, you will have a police record (the sort used when conducting Police Checks), which is not covered by the Clean Slate bill.

Given the nature of his crimes, and his criminal record, he probably never has to work in paid employment again

You cannot give up working, as this is deemed a lifestyle choice, and will not reduce your Child Support obligations.

He will therefore have a Government-funded (albeit minimal) income for the rest of his life

If you can’t find work, you will receive a Government-funded (albeit minimal) income, but your Child Support obligations will mount as a debt against you.

This means he will have a lot of time on his hands

He will be held accountable for his crimes, for the rest of his life.

You will be held accountable for your Family Court crimes (subject to any form of CYFs or Police involvement, or awarding of Domestic Protection Order), for the rest of your life

For example when applying for a job.

Every time you submit to a Police Check, for example when applying for a job.

He will be automatically ineligible for any job that deals with children.

You will be pretty well automatically ineligible for any job that either deals with children, or asks the question whether you have any criminal convictions of a serious or violent nature.

Yours may not be convictions, but your prospective employer will certainly want to know more details when a Police Check reveals your Family Court charges!

Presumably after his ten year supervision period, he is free to be alone with children, to live close to schools and the like, as he will no longer be deemed a high risk.

His risk, as a proven paedophile will not disappear, and will only be controlled by any ability to control his contact with children.

Even though you were adjudged to somehow wanting to rape your own children (not other children, just your own), this risk miraculously disappears the day they are released from Family Court jurisdiction, the day they turn nineteen.

Any out of the million or so children in this country aged under sixteen will be at his disposal

Of course, your grandchildren will also suddenly be at risk, depending on the level of vindictiveness your ex can muster when the time comes.

Here a heinous crime has been proven, and all possible and appropriate action and safeguard implemented, to the maximum extent of the law.

A rational person might argue the law is inadequate.

Here, no crime need ever have been committed, let-alone proven, but you will be sentenced ‘on the balance of probabilities’, to the maximum extent of the law.

A vindictive ex will still argue the law is inadequate.