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Thu 23rd February 2017

Dropping Defense of Protection Order

Filed under: General — martin @ 4:45 pm

Can anyone tell me how I drop my defense of a protection order?
Thanks

20 Responses to “Dropping Defense of Protection Order”

  1. Buster says:

    https://www.justice.govt.nz/family/domestic-violence/

    Here is the web page with all information you need, not to difficult and you can do it online.

    Just remember if you do

    It remains on your file 4 LIFE and can be used against you at anytime in the future including

    FUTURE JOB prospects. So think about it carefully.

  2. Paul W says:

    Hi mate, please please please don’t cancel your defence. I failed to defend mine and it resulted in 16 failed ‘breaches of protection order’ charges being laid against me by my psychotic ex. Defend defend defend is the only way forward!!!!

  3. Buster says:

    See I told ya GENERAL

    And Paul wouldn’t be the only one!

  4. martin says:

    Thanks Buster, but that didn’t get me what I was looking for. I have given notice of my intention to defend, however it seems pointless as my children have testified against me to a social worker under a s132 and it would appear pointless now to defend because nobody will believe me. Also if I lose (which appears almost certain), I will be hit up for costs also. My ex has already successfully been granted a PO against me several years ago and then she supported it being dropped – life’s a bitch right!?
    So I need to know who to notify my intention to drop my defense – is it the court registrar via an email?

  5. Simon grant says:

    In my case the children’s mother:

    After my application for access, immediately applied for her protection order
    I defended it – $6,000.
    She didn’t get it, the judges findings: much of her evidence was unbelievable, her evidence was unimpressive and she was prone to exaggeration. ( closest thing to an out right lying nut the judge could say I suggest.
    There were no care or protection issues and no impediment to access.
    My application fro access had no barriers, but the nut still opposed access, another hearing.
    Access granted 2 hours per time 12 until 2 Tuesday, Friday, Sunday. thanks her honor judge Johnson almost impossible but I did it.
    More applications for access all opposed by the legal aid recipient (nut)
    5 years later her second application for a protection Order.
    Defended successfully another $6,000.

    Can you believe a finding like the first one (much of her evidence was unbelievable her detour when giving evidence was unimpressive and she was prone to exaggeration) even after this the nut got a chance to apply for a second PO?

    But wait there is more.
    Yes she hangs out with. Bikees, developers a meth problem, could hardly remember her kids names and YES, You Got It A third PO application. This, on my view was plain and simple fraud, scamm, legal aid milking and process bullshit.

    Walk away mate , sorry to say and I would never have thought that until about 20 hearings passed. The court don’t want you, what have they or their process done to encourage your input into your children?

    If the answer is They have supported her blindly accept that is the way it is. They don’t want decent fathers we must realise that (actions speak louder than words)

  6. martin says:

    Hi Simon, thanks for the advice, and sorry to hear your story. On a more pleasant note, you’ll be pleased to hear Johnson has retired – only 20 years too late!

  7. Simon grant says:

    But wait, there’s more.

    It may well be that her honor judge Johnson also made findings with out eveidence and overturned earlier directions of a different judge only a month after that Judge made his directions. I was told this by “a blind man running who was running for a bus” at the time who said he could see that directions had been made by her honor with out evidence.

    We ,ay all wonder “what the fuck is this process”?
    Who on earth should have any faith at all in this process?

    Did her honors directions, seemingly with out evidence and over turning another judges directions a month earlier support good outcomes for the children or bad outcomes eg far more detrimental to them that the directions overturned ones?

    The answer, no fucking way.

    This crap was escalated to his honor Judge Boshier who responded, but explained that he was unable to intervene in the natural course of justice. (some might say the natural course of justice is not “directions with out any evidence”)

    One week later things changed, big time, Johnson made new directions which were far better for the children, then she never dealt with the file again. So perhaps his honor judge Boshier might be thanked.

    But wait ther has to be more, yep her honor judge Ulrich, every kid who loves their dad can than their lucky starts those two have gone some say.

    Who are their replacements though?

    The process is broken, systemically gender biased and has gained its reputation as so for good reason, many suggest.

  8. hornet says:

    Defend this like your life depends on it = because it does – once your credibility and reputation is destroyed you have NOTHING.

    DEFEND DEFEND DEFEND……….I had false accusations made about me, sneaked into court under Ex parte non notified – and the only thing that saved me was I DEFENDED myself against the LIES.

  9. Jerry says:

    hornet @8: Absolutely. Hornet is absolutely right about credibility and reputation and I’ll throw self respect in there.

  10. Simon grant says:

    Self preservation is the key here.

    It’s all very well to talk about putting the children first and working, battling for them but realise this:

    Your children’s mother will be:
    Funded
    Supported
    Believed by all, womens groups, the school, the GP and the brainless mon thinking budgie down the road.
    The court may well mitigate care arrangements, cash and contact dad but side with mummy even if she becomes a meth hoe.
    The police will side with her at all times.
    She will lie

    All of these things will happen to you even after you defend this thing.
    She can apply for her cherished PO as many times as she likes.

    Are you ready for that?
    I didn’t quit, 23 hearings
    C4c appeared to fabricate, pervert the course of justice, do fuck all except blindly support the mother to the point of utter disgrace.
    It may be that a couple of judges cover his arse so that he could do this.
    It appears that court outcomes were predetermined.

    Think back, how has the court process supported you?
    Actions speak louder than words, we hear about how the Family Court is fair to all parties, warm and cuddly towards mothers and fathers.
    Reforms will make it better, smoother lovelier than before.

    Who believes this?

    Preserve yourself first or you will be no good to your children no matter what happens with this PO application.
    Think about the future you face.

  11. Jerry says:

    Simon Grant @10: All of what you warn is true on steroids. I know it only too well because it fits with my own ordeal. However I am talking about long term survival when I mention self respect preservation. Children grow up and are likely to take on board parental alienating messages. Its good if we can face out kids and say we did all we could. But most of all its about being right within orselves.

  12. Simon grant says:

    Hey Jerry.

    You are totally correct too.

    Looking at yourself in the mirror and knowing the person looking back did all they could for their children is also something that kept me going after about my 15th hearing, third threat of arrest and beating that “the mad trollop” organised for me.

    Clearly knowing the outcomes for the children (based on the outcomes for her older children to a different father who had also been allinated by the control freak narcissistic process supported excuse for a mother)

    I am still trying for them, they are almost 15 but as friends have told me ” if the children can’t work out where their better off by now then they never will”

    The trouble is when the mother is that much of a nut she is performing beyond any consideration for the children and is motivated by spite and control. If the nut that you are dealing with is motivated by that then outcomes for the children are not even in their thinking. That is when we turn to the process, the Family Court, the Police, the legal services agency, the Court Coordinators, the judges like Johnson and Ulrich, the law Society, the Juducial Conduct commissioner, the Minister of Justice and possibly consider – what the fuck are you lot running?

    What are you supporting, blindly.

    If one decent judge, just one had bollocked her, and said “lady we think you are taking the piss out of us, this process and your children’s chances. Any more of this and you will loose the right to have these children in your care for 90 days and during that time you will go to jail”.

    If that had happened after the 5 th hearing the outcomes for the children, the taxpayer, the state, the crime rate, the court reputation, credability, child abuse and every thing else would be greatly improved.

    We all know this, a bloody idiot knows this, but still this shit lurches on after 40 years, countless reports, countless child abuse at the hands of mummies new partner (because dad has gone)

    It is for these reasons that many thinking people simply have come to the obvious conclusion that:

    The powers that be actually want the aforementioned dreadful outcomes to persist – its how they survive, it’s how institutions such as Epuni boys home, permissions, courts lawyers, police all have a function and get to perpetuate their existence.

    Tens of thousands of people have watched this crap unfold and carry on for decades and many suggest that there is no other conclusion for this shit to continue.

    So: perhaps with that in mind fathers might consider their involvement before they end up in a dire situation and may consider taking their own lives for example as many have done as a result of this. A simply lack of a decent judge reading the mother the riot act and telling the tart that She Will Go To Jail, make so e examples, publicise it well, let the public see the consequences and this shit will stop. But NO Way.

  13. Jerry says:

    Simon Grant @12: Us fathers find ourselves having to cope with various differing attacks from all directions and somehow are meant to cope easily, and of course have no problem funding it. The truth is, and i think this is what other comments are about- and is also true -//- we have our limits. We do get to a point we can bare no more – and its not healthy to try. But in my world when we reach that stage, we have done our honest best already. Maybe after time out we can push on again – maybe not. I’ve met men who would be slandered as “Dead-beat Dads” – these guys judged the system stacked, and a win was impossible and life destroying. These guys took off and started a new life. Generally, this lot did okay for themselves – but I don’t know how their kids faired. We cannot judge others. I’m sure some who simply left and vanished got it right – well if they can look in the mirror without regret anyway.
    Others – well me at least, I never knew I was so strong. There is some truth that going through hell can make us strong and respect worthy. We can find out what we are really made of.

  14. Simon grant says:

    Agreed Jerry, but when you reach that point, Walk Away. Preserve yourself, look at how many guys have taken their own lives? This is why Australia changed its laws – shared care as of right in 2005.

    Look how many men have been shot by the police lately.
    How many of these have been shut out and worked over by their children’s mother, supported by yep, the courts, the process, the police, the schools, the GP, legal aid.

    Guys be aware of what you face, most have run a mile and don’t go past two hearings, the process participants know this, nothing changes though, it just gets worse. They don’t want you dad because their actions and the process does not support your involvement.

  15. Jerry says:

    Simon Grant @14: I agree with you fully. Thing is we cannot know the limits of the others. They need to find out what their limits are and take the appropriate option. I agree that one man succumbing to suicide or getting shot is too many. But I’ve also seen it that at the time thos guys need friends and a network – they find themselves isolated, alone, and maybe others stay away because of moods – been there – got the proverbial T-shirt.
    So long as they know they did their best {whatever that best is}, thats the major thing.
    But the older I become, I perceive the noxious and harmful stereotypical brainwashing us guys are raised with. Starts with “Boys don’t cry”; and progresses to wanker, man-up, support your family, stand up for women and on and on and on . . . . . I think we are brain-washed – and that begs the questions: who brainwashes us? and why? I think males may be so brainwashed, we enforce it upon ourselves without really thinking it through – and if we can’t conform, we deem ourselves a failure. I recall that failure zone for myself – I told myself at that time, “I had failed to protect ny children – therefore I had failed as man!”. Looking back now, that seems a bit harsh and out of order.
    I did the Herald crossword today. Its about good qualities – supposedly. But as I filled it in – the answers seemed weapons used to control us and make us {but not others} conform. So I recommend reviewing the ethics and deciding which are really useful and fair.

  16. Time4Change says:

    Hi Paul,

    I have had a recent experience with protection order(s) and the associated emotional and financial distress that attaches to them.

    Sometimes it may seem hard, but what you are working towards is some “FaceTime” with the Judge.

    As Buster stated this (FPO) is forever and eternity is a long time. However not entirely true as you can apply for a discharge after time has passed (without any breaches) and or circumstances change (i.e moved countries).

    If you can afford it keep going with your defence. However bear in mind recovery of costs are available through the District Court Rules this includes indemnity costs which can be the whole amount. (Seek legal advice on that topic).

    I have been watching and reading this site with interest for 2 years now and I finally signed up.

    I am awaiting the admin to approve my registration so I can share with all men and interesting article about 3 woman that banded together and headed to the Family Court to get at me. I fought long and hard and then finally found a way to by pass the Family Court and head to another legal juncture where there was a fairer, unbiased system.

    I hope this helps.

  17. Simon grant says:

    Time for a change, yes we all want to know of how to bypass the family court. Based on the Sunday programme (all should watch this) about David Bain and senior judge Ian Binney who was commissioned by the government (Collins) to assess the compensation payment for David Bain. This is a MUST watch TV on Demand Sunday Programe Ian Binney – David Bain.

    This Programe and extensive interview of Former Deputy Minister of Justice of Canada Judge Binney explains much about the justice system of this country which the NZ Family Court is part of.

  18. JayNee says:

    Hi everyone, I have read all your comments and just like Time4Change are waiting for admin approval! Now i must say I am Female but don’t hate yet lol, I don’t disagree with any of you’s the fathers do get the “shit end of the stick” Im divorced with 4 daughters my ex done everything to take our kids and after 4 years and 100k later here i am, i never put him down and always told the girl ( 2 had stopped talking to him ) that one day they will need their dad my parents are still married ( 38 yrs ) and my dad is Awesome couldn’t imagine not having him in my life, all the girls now talk to there dad go every weekend and holidays and whenever he wants them we attend school things together etc so not every mother is a crazy bitch lol but thats not why I’m here, I’m here because a PO that has put on my friend by the mother of his daughter and its been made final coz he was stupid and didn’t defend it, I’m wondering how i can get it removed or at least his daughter taken off it? Now this is where it becomes tricky The dad is currently in prison on remand and was in there when it was put on him during the 5 months he’s been there the mother has had herself quite a good time, including 7 weeks ago asking me to babysit there daughter for a few hours, why she went to court on her 5th drink driving charge she didn’t go to court she decided it would be a better idea why smoking meth to go on the run for 2 weeks to the other end of the country resulting in her being caught and ending up in prison herself! i still have the child and cyfs is involved and i have with support of the dad and his family and the mother and her family applied for full custody, the child lawyer is wanting supervised access to the child from both parents but I’m my opinion the dad was the only one holding the family together ( theres 2 other children with different father who also had a PO on him from her and he now has custody of the 2 ) how do i help him get custody of this child? i want to get him hoe detention at mine and the charges dropped he’s never assaulted her or the children its complete lies! The police think he has chefs think he has the lawyers think he has, they also think he was using meth because of what the mother has said, she got womens refuge to relocate her get all new furniture ( which she then sold for meth ) every time they had an argument she rand the police on him saying she assaulted her which he didn’t!! any help would be great i just don’t know what else i can do to help him, or to prove its all lies

  19. grant bell says:

    Please help,my ex wife lied to obtain an order,I have proof she has obtained an order to blackmail,lied on court documents and lied on a police statement,motive was kids wanting to live with me,got done on the order three times,couldn’t defend at the time as I had no money,the proof came through afterwards anyway, lawyers are useless,unless you have deep pockets ,no action and they have trouble putting the full truth out there,don’t see why we have to pay to clear our names when a woman’s lied, because they have legal aid we don’t get anything,what do I do,like I said,got proof,can prove she’s a lier,I refuse to see my kids due to the blackmail,don’t want to continue getting done on the order,haven’t seen them in almost two years,please help

  20. Jerry says:

    Grant Bell@19; Its dangerous to your relationship with your kids if you do not see them. I have no real advice for your over-all situation, because its rarely fair or just. But I thought I would let you know what I did when I figured it was dangerous for me to see my kids. Although access was not permitted, somehow counsel for child and the psych arranged it without court approval – suspicious eh! . . . . Supervision was not required. So to protect myself [not the kids], I arranged my own supervisor for every access. I got reputable friends whom the kids liked and trusted. My supervisors were there to witness what we did where and when.
    It is easy to think that if you don’t see your kids, then the other side will tell them you don’t love them, don’t want to see them and of course use your absence to give credibility to all sorts of fictional far fetched slurs against you. Be careful.

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