A look into the mind of female WISDOM
I was in Russia last year and met a lady, Natasha, in small town 400km north of Moscow. When she knew I was from NZ she was excited and wanted to talk to me about her life time hero, John Walker. Over the last year I have built up a good relationship with her and met some of her Russian friends here. If you are single, intelligent and want a real lady in your life you have better odds of success with a Russian one.
Below is a letter I received from Natasha that gives a good insight into the mind of a 37yr old Russian Woman.
……..I could never understand feminism. Sometimes I laugh at these crazy women, sometimes I pity these poor unhappy women who maybe just were not destinied to meet real men?? And I don’t have any familiar feminists to talk in person to and find out what makes a woman try so unnatural role and function?? For me personally, a feminist is a kind of monster who pretends to be man and woman at once, but instead she looses all her feminity, charm and attraction and at the same time she fails in getting qualities of a true man. She becomes a type of scary hybrid:-) Total failure:-(
I always thought that it’s no need for a real woman to struggle for leadership with a man.Of course, if she is a real woman:-) Let them rule, I don’t care:-) I am talking here about intimate relationships between a man and a woman. I also always thought that a woman demonstrates her complete helplesness and failure as a woman, if she has to demand something from man directly- why don’t you love me? why don’t you pay enough attention to me? etc These blames mean that it’s only a woman fault and failure because she didn’t work hard enough on her relationship and didn’t MAKE a man love and pay attention to her. It’s her evident failure as a woman, no man’s fault at all. Each normal woman has her secret excellence over man and is always able to make a man act the way she wants indirectly in a very kind and respecting way, without insulting a man’s ego or struggling with him. A man practically has no chance “to win” such a woman:-) So…think it over carefully. A traditional woman is even more dangerous for a man acting indirectly but more successful compared to shouting martial feminists:-) Once again, it refers only to close relations, but not to business and political fields. I guess feminists insist on being equal with men in all fields of political and social activities as well, da?It’s very important to remember that a male is always a leader, he was created this way. He is more aggressive (in good meaning) and initiator by nature. It’s crazy to force intentionally a man not to be a leader and decrease his self-confidence vitally important for woman! Man has always to be a decision maker and have responsibility for his woman, his brains are created this way. A woman should trust his brains if she is not stupid.
I will make the only weak attempt to protect western feminists:-) Maybe they started their crazy feminist movement being in a desperate situation after they faced many western infantile men in their life? Maybe many men face feminists with great joy as redemption??:-) Because feminists would set them free of responsibility to be heads in relationships, families, necessaty to make decisions? Maybe many men would feel more comfortable if women take complete care of them? But I have to admit that this supposition is perhaps a total nonsense:-)
Speaking of Russian men, the situation is rather sad here:-( It can be explained by our recent history when communists ruled and when the most active, noble, brave and stirring men were killed, shot and died in Stalin’s concentration camps. It’s a scientific fact that such post-traume syndroms don’t disappear. They remain in souls and minds of next generations. So we have many infantile men with many fears on subconscious level. Besides, the current poor economical situation doesn’t add confidence to our men:-( The state deprives many men from having opportunity to earn decent money to provide their families. So many men are weak and not confident. But mainly it’s not their direct fault, the time of repentance of doing crazy things to it’s nation is ahead for my country:-(All Russian women are supposed to be feminists in such conditions:-)) But even being under such hard curcumstances, most Russian ladies keep valuing traditional family values. They do their best in keeping in men their confidence and qualities of leaders. I have the only question to ask though…. history of western countries doesn’t know wars, repressions or totalitarian regimes that would influence on men negatively and ruin or corrupt real man’s qualities as it was in Russia. Why are the western women that crazy that become like total regime and try to do that to their men in prosperous society with their own hands and stupid feminist movements??!
All the best to you and yours.
Take care,
Natasha
Dear Triassic,
I knew a girl also called Natasha, from Russia too. She wrote to a friend of mine, she sounded almost too good to be true too. She came over from Russia and was very dreamy. They got married, and the day after getting legal status flew the coop. She went over to her Russian handler, pimp or boyfriend already in the new country. These Russian gals all play the game, for they want to get the hell out of the socialist utopia (where we are headed full steam ahead), where additionally traditional morality has gone to the 4 winds!
Needless to say I had warned my friend everytime I met him that these eastern brides were often big scams. I have more horror stories to tell, but if you are following your one-eyed-jack there’s nothing I can say.
Being as logically direct as my reputation is I got cut off from my friend until she dumped him. Then he wanted to go back to the old way of me trying to help him on how to find a nice gal, and his ego driven way of ignoring me.
I advised him to deal with every western man’s fixation of blonde hair bombshells, that you have all worshipped in the girlie mags(nudge, nudge wink-wink, know what I mean, say no more).
I advise you to find a gal from a culture where traditional morality means something (it doesn’t have to be Christian or even religious). Watch what they do and not what they say. I think you can increase your odds of finding a honest girl that way. (Try Japanese and Taiwanese women).
These women from these countries are stronger & smarter in that they don’t think strength in charater is found in words, but in actions. In there cultures their men have been the ones centering on indirectness, which left the wives to be soft and direct (as compared to the loud and indirect loving women in the west-after marriage of course. In Japan men who where direct got there heads cut off for ages. Men in their culture were and are all aware of indirectness, and in the past would send game playing women back home to their family with little social(Christian)sanction. So
strong, direct, loyal, soft, frugal women where attractive to men who didn’t want any game playing at home(shoes and gossip were and are left at the doorstep for this separation of the worlds).
This meant weak, loud, indirect, hard, visa card spending women became untouchable(even if they were attractive).
Did I learn this all from books? No. I just saw how my 3 older sisters followed fashion like zombies and rationalized every emotion with any excuse at hand.
I’ll let Menz’s women vistors pull out their hair here and get hysterical now.
Comment by Intrepid — Fri 26th May 2006 @ 1:39 pm
Fair comment. I should have mentioned that I was invited back to Natasha’s home and met her husband who I found to be equally knowlegable and pleasant.
Comment by triassic — Fri 26th May 2006 @ 2:06 pm
Maybe if you stopped ‘genderising’ every New Zealand woman you met you would actually see the person behind the ‘female’? No offence but I just happened onto this website and feel that this is just another extreme at one particular end. I’m all for men’s rights but I’m all for woman’s rights as well. Let’s just starting working together for once and see each other as a person rather than let the gender dictate the behaviour. :0)
Comment by Justine — Fri 26th May 2006 @ 4:40 pm
hi Justine
convince your “sisters” of that and all will be well
Comment by starr — Fri 26th May 2006 @ 4:50 pm
Justin
I totally agree with what you say. The truth is that most of the people on this site are not actually against women or the fact that the women have gained so much. In fact one needs to respect what they have done.
It is all about balance.
Some of the posts are extreme and some of the comments too, including mine. I think given the opportunity some of us feed into things a bit much but there is nothing wrong with venting.
Comment by julie — Sat 27th May 2006 @ 4:35 pm
Well Julie, What A weird web you weave,
First nonsence, second inconceivable preposterous absurd and eminenly santimonious and repugnance to most intellectual thinkers.
STOP YOUR deliberate deleterious pretence of issues you know nothing about.. in other words… find something else to mouth about.. not parenthood or anything else for that matter you are tiresome.;.
Comment by all of us... — Sat 27th May 2006 @ 5:43 pm
Dear Justine,
Let me guess when a man gets separted from his kids by the state you are so outraged that you go down to the courts and give them a piece of your mind every time, for not only generalizing about men but in their acting on it so as to take away someone kids. When at any of your gossipfeasts (sorry most women don’t gossip) with you friends you come down on all generalizing of the female kind with the self-rightiousness you have expresssed here(sorry most women never act self-rightious), like a true Amazonian. You cut off any woman when their generalizing turns to blanketing too.
Or do you only surf men sites to get outraged when the generalizing is at your expense and takes nothing from you but your sheltered existence? Are you ready for a PC Menz police, or will you go and complain to the government to remove free generalizing as hate speech? Please tell us what rights do women not have already, and should women lose any rights that they have already? What is it that grandparent have done to women to deserve their no access?
Me thinks that you’re acting. I can just imagine you calling the local station to complain when men get labelled with the short end of the stick.
You want men being nice, for you are afraid of them, but women need not behave for they are emotionally justified. If you are equal to men “suck it up” and debate directly, if your thin skinned and want to be treated like an old fashion lady then you were lying about wanting feminist equal rights(or do want to pick and choose between the old ways and the new and have men learn your moods to learn when you want either or). I’m not your poor husband and therefore cannot spend my waking hours guessing which women is going to rise(the equal thick skinned women or the shelter women who is just a mere person this minute). I have not used bad language and am making accurate generalizations. Does truth hurt the princess? Does the King wear no clothes? (Sorry most women care not for clothes). In the end this emotional denial would have logic cast aside for politeness.
I have 3 older sisters and you are old news Barbie/Amazonian. Make up your mind and not your face.
Comment by Intrepid — Sat 27th May 2006 @ 8:21 pm
Dear all of us,
I do take in what you say. I think some of it myself.
Also I have just realised that one person here is having serious trouble that I take some responsibility for encouraging anti-cyfs.
It has never been my intention to hurt anyone and the truth be known I don’t actually hate police, psychologists, lawyers etc. I don’t even hate cyfs workers.
Thanx for putting me in my place.
I am sure all of you know what you are doing. You have had 20+ years experience.
Comment by julie — Sat 27th May 2006 @ 8:44 pm
I am married to a woman from the former soviet union, not because I could not find a NZ woman but because that was whom I fell in love with.
And to be be quite honest, it is my experience that such women have honesty, family values and a lack of selfishness that are largely lacking in many NZ women.
As for the popular belief that there are droves of soviet women seeking to marry to escape to a better life, it is simply true.
Most Russians I have met in NZ have a lower standard of living over here than they had back home. While it is true that their very poor are poorer, the average person is better off. I know, I have been over there and seen it for myself.
Comment by DWL — Sat 27th May 2006 @ 9:05 pm
There was a typo in the 2nd to last paragraph above.
It should read:
“As for the popular belief that there are droves of soviet women seeking to marry to escape to a better life, it is simply NOT true.”
Sorry about any inconvenience.
Comment by DWL — Sat 27th May 2006 @ 11:56 pm
Damn, in between 9.05 and 11.56 pm I booked my ticket to Moscow.
Comment by PaulM — Sun 28th May 2006 @ 12:36 am
Dear Comrades,
Dhis slite on the upon the reputation of the dhe motherland is unbecoming for such a punny little country. It would dake more dhan 100 diny kiwi islands to bit into the Great former Soviet Union.
To compare one of our beautiful virgin Russian vomen to the decadent veminists that inhabit your punny little islands makes me laugh ha ha!
Signed Valdamir Vigist Dick
Former KGB( Now head pimp to the Russian underground)
Russian Ad- (Women for 1,000,000 rubles: 10 New Zealand Dollars)
We have women who know how to sit on your rubles.
Comment by Intrepid — Sun 28th May 2006 @ 2:00 am
Justine commented:
If you spend a bit more time on this site you’ll see that we try not to generalise in this way (although individual contributors might from time-to-time).
The view that “all NZ women are evil bitches” is just as dumb as “all men are bastards”, in my opinion.
As for those powerful, loud, pushy, liberated western women? I personally reckon they are the best – you just have to make sure of their personal integrity before making a commitment.
Comment by JohnP — Sun 28th May 2006 @ 10:09 am
I am happy that I have a wife who puts family first and hasn’t had her head screwed up by like many NZ women.
Many other NZ men have learned the same, and are choosing foreign women.
Mow you know why there is a shortage of men here!
Comment by DWL — Sun 28th May 2006 @ 12:07 pm
You know, after 2 failed marriages to 2 Kiwi women I got together with asian partner for all the above reasons, and advice from others.
She turned out to be the most dishonest, uncaring and mentally abusive person I have ever meet in my life.
That is not because she was asian, or even a women. Let’ put it all into perspective. People are people, and we shouldn’t generalise based on our own personal experience, be they negative or positve.
Rights for children, parents and families is what its all about folks.
Keep your eye on the ball; don’t let the fog distort your vision of happeness in the future.
Comment by Wayne — Sun 28th May 2006 @ 7:17 pm
Dear Wayne,
Which country was she brought up in all her life, Japan or Taiwan? I said it will increase your odds, and stated it was not a sure thing, but I’d still like to know what your willing to pass on. Unless she was brought here for most of her life, or was she from the other countries like China, Korea, Vietman- where the wars and communists did away with most of the traditions. Please give us more than asian, for race isn’t what I’m talking about at all. It is respect for tradition and complimentary roles. Was her family traditional or was she brought up in a brothel?
I amazed at when you make a point about say issues a,b,c people still go off on d,e,f. Yes, I know some nasty asian women too, but they had no dads involved, worshipped Madonna and or thought sleeping around like a man was normal nowadays! I await something about a,b,c, or to the point. I’m bound to get g,h,i though.
In a report done on the topic of successful marriages between racial groups, they found high rates of success between white men and asian women, white women and black men, moderate success between asian women and black men(ex:Tiger Woods) and asian men and white women. Yet what was almost never happening statistically was asian men and black women (or more specifically western black women and Asian men).
I’d be interested to hear what any of you, who have warm fuzzy answers for every logical position say about that? What mental gymnastics await us? Why can’t love be found between all groups, hmm? What is that makes these two groups not find love together?
Comment by Intrepid — Sun 28th May 2006 @ 10:46 pm
OK intrepid,
you’ve picked up on some of the cause of my grief, so I’ll spill more.
My x was North Vietnamese, and all indications point to her having a past that included prostitution. This is supported by her owm comments (over 3 years and one week, long enough to claim my home), the comments of her x husband and pschologists.
She moved to NZ on a student visa and married a man more than 30 years older who had just been released from prison for raping two children. A very evil looking man, with a very evil character. She left him 10 days after getting her NZ citizenship.
I was introduced to her and fell in love quickly, beleiving that she was a victim, but finding out later that she had used the old man to gain citizenship and used false documents to get her daughter out of Vietnam without the child’s father’s knowledge. The more I learned, the more I realised I was in a trap, and that she was after my house, wich I eventually lost because of the persicution handed down by the Family Court. This woman is the mother of my only child (a son), and has done all she can to keep my son and i apart, with the help of legal aid, a team of two lawyers and two barristers, the DPB and a boss who she “doesn’t work for in any capacity” (yeah right!).
I have no rights, and even though I was our child’s primary caregiver prior to separation, the Family Court has still not allowed a custody hearing to go ahead after 2.5 years.
The mother breached a Non Removal Order by purchasing airline tickets to Vietnam (while on DPB and Legal Aid!) and admitted to immigration fraud in the Family Court, but was still allowed to go to Vietnam with my son, and that was why I went on the Holmes Show. The public of NZ were not allowed to know about the mother’s fraud and sinister background, and I have been persicuted by the Family Court ever since!
Yet I don’t have ill feelings toward asians or women. It is the system that has failed us as a family, and if the judge had of spoke out about her ignoring the non-removal order and alienating behaviour, I beleive she would have behaved entirely different.
Comment by Wayne — Mon 29th May 2006 @ 1:16 am
Sorry to hear that, Wayne.
My formerly-foreign wife is wonderful, kind, intelligent and family-oriented and has all those qualities that I had given up expecting to find in a NZ woman.
Comment by DWL — Mon 29th May 2006 @ 9:32 am
Dear Wayne,
Sorry about your terrible situation. The state allowed her to use funds to travel back to Vietman, while you can barely see your boy. It’s all so evil! I think you should be very angry and set your sites on getting at this state dysfunction as constructively and as agressively as possible with other men(if you haven’t already).
The good men may do separately is small compared with what they may do collectively – Benjamin Franklin
Comment by Intrepid — Mon 29th May 2006 @ 12:09 pm