Avoiding ex-parte Protection Orders

If you think there is a possibility your partner may apply for a protection order as a tactic to separate you from your children, send the following letter to the Family Court (more details below).

The Registrar

(Local court name) Family Court

Your name

Your address

Your telephone number

I have reason to believe that a protection order will be taken out by my wife/partner, (her name) against myself. There are no grounds for this order. I have never been violent or abusive during our relationship.

There is no necessity for an ex parte order and I wish to appear if any application is made.

Yours faithfully,

(your name)


“Ex parte order” means a protection order being given without you being present and able to put your side of the story forward.

Copy this letter, add your own details and print with extra-wide margins.

Take it to the Registrar of the Family Court nearest to where your partner is living. It is a good idea to take it to other Family Courts in the area because this letter will only work at the court at which it has been presented.

When delivering the letter to the court, have them photocopy and stamp it so that you have a record of the letter having been delivered.

Update 2015

I know this has worked in the past for several men. However, I have recently received feedback that the Auckland Central Family Court refused to accept a letter following this model.

It is important to note that this is not an official document, and Courts are not required to accept it. You will need to be courteous and polite. Make it clear that all you are asking for is to be allowed to tell your side of the story before a Protection Order is issued.

If you give this a go, please leave feedback about the response you get below. Comments that are not directly related to this strategy will be removed.

4 Responses to “Avoiding ex-parte Protection Orders”

  1. Shane says:

    What can I do if a protection order has already been issued and there are no grounds for this order. I have never been violent or abusive during our relationship. I need help but cannot find a lawyer the one I went to was appointed lawyer for child and another one just talked money, she didn’t seem to want to help

  2. JohnPotter says:

    Hi Shane, I’ve removed your full name to avoid making your situation worse.

    Please tell us which city you live in, but make sure you don’t include any identifying details.

  3. Shane (not real name) says:

    I live in Whanganui

  4. Allan Harvey says:

    Kia Ora Shane,
    Kidz Need Dadz (Wellington) loosely covers Whanganui.
    You can e-mail me on allan.harvey”at”xtra.co.nz or cal me on 0272420112.
    As John says stay away from Public forums.

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