Snoopy’s Day
Look, there’s got to be something better to do than whipping each other with one-eyed feminists.
Thank God it’s the 1st December and we can all pull out our treasured version of Snoopy’s Xmas
If you haven’t got your own, hit the link and enjoy a YouTube treasure.
[With lyrics]
“With Snoopy dead in his sights
He pulled the trigger up tight
Why he didn’t shoot
Well, we’ll never know
Or, was it the (Xmas) bells
From the village below?”
It’s an interesting storyline … Honourable gentlemen who put their differences aside for Christmas?
What’s your take on it?
But, when it comes to Christmas have you got one of those one-eyed feminists who wants to use the children to whip you at Christmas time?
You know the sort? Won’t share Christmas Day, would never let the children stay with you on Christmas Eve, even if it is your normal time with the children – can’t have them waking up at Dad’s place on Christmas morning or variations of a theme that might be far worse.
What’s the worst stunt the children’s mother pulled on you for Christmas and how did you deal with it?
Or perhaps you’re the lucky one, and your ex discusses Christmas presents for the children so you don’t accidentally double up on the same gift?
Or are your children, smart little critters, who try and play you off because they can make good out of competing parents?
Will you make the children leave their Christmas presents at your place this year because last year their mother disappeared them and they were never seen again?
What’s your experience of Christmas and peace and goodwill to all?
It doesn’t always turn out well for separated fathers, separated from their children too, not just their mother.
Looking back, what advice might you give to your younger self?
I’m looking forward to Christmas this year. My kids are nearly 3 and 5 so the 5 year old has a pretty good idea what it’s about. My older son is still squatting, going nowhere fast but you can only give suggestions so many times. I’ve picked up a few weeks work before Christmas so I will be stuffed at the end. I’ve also been working hard for a while now on other sites trying to get a men’s perspective across. There’s only so much of the one eyed feminists bullshit a man can take. I’m holding my ground and at least challenging beliefs. But it is tiring work fighting an argument and getting more denigration and Personel attacks than constructive comment, so I’m relaxing as best I can on Christmas.
Thankfully we can give good, and many presents to the kids, there dirt cheap if you shop around. Kmart was great last year. But the real present is time, and seeing joy.
It saddens me, having experienced it myself, not being able to give my child presents, talk to them etc on this special day.
It can be a dark place to be so if this is your experience this Christmas, look into yourself, if you are doing your best, with good intentions then you are giving the best present you can give them. The years may pass and those special days will be lost, but the child forgets the toys, the candy cane. They don’t forget you kept being in there lives, they watch the bulshit, and like my older son who I hardly got to see, doesn’t have respect for the behavours of his mother. That is the end goal. When your children are adults they respect you for doing you best, for trying, for not behaving badly, for not giving up.
Best wishes people.
Comment by DJ Ward — Mon 3rd December 2018 @ 9:06 pm
#1 DJ Ward,
I sure agree with your words….
> That is the end goal. When your children are adults they respect you for doing your best,
> for trying, for not behaving badly, for not giving up.
In my experience, better understanding has taken about 30 years. This is about 2 generations !
I was originally hoping 5 years.
“judges” saying to be patient and making matronizing comments, were the most painful things I have heard in my life, when taken against the background of the actions of these “judges”.
I fairly quickly learned not to treat any day as sacred. That just made me more vulnerable, for no value at all.
So, take good care of yourself and of your children too.
And spare quite a few thoughts for the many men who are unable to see their children, not just at Christmas, but at all.
In particular, those driven out of NZ or the freedom to be in NZ.
There is too much harshness, that is hidden from most people. In the long run, many people suffer eventually. This is because our society cannot respond sensibly to what it cannot see or know about. Secrecy causes so much harm.
I hate unnecessary suffering or suffering going on too long, for no good reason.
Comment by MurrayBacon — Tue 4th December 2018 @ 5:27 pm
Are Men Different Types of Caregivers Than Women?
https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/are-men-different-types-of-caregivers-than-women/
I often wondered about that question, especially when I saw men supporting men under severe social stress.
What worried me far more than the details about caring, was observing that the majority of men would accept some care and when sufficient of their needs were met, we wouldn’t see them for dust. That attitude seemed to me to be short sighted and selfish.
The details about types of caring seemed inconsequential by comparison, for actually delivering care when it is required.
But we do need to have a better understanding of the original question.
It is worth having a look through The Good Men website.
Comment by MurrayBacon — Wed 5th December 2018 @ 9:33 am
Thank you for the Post Downunder and DJ for sharing and your efforts to protect the rights of men and Murray for your need to keep balance seen. The article Murray posted above on Men and Caring says what we already know and feel, so now, to come to a stage where men are being painted so dreadfully is so very SAD, and so inconsistent with the wave of recent inclusivenesses.
I want to apologise for sometimes talking out of frustration and a whole in my head, but mostly I want to thank guys here for being there for me when I needed to release some of those frustrations, you are the bomb.
Merry Christmas and I hope everyone gets to fit in some relaxation of the mind and heart muscles.
Comment by mama — Thu 13th December 2018 @ 10:39 am
No need for apologies, at all.
What matters most, is that through hurt and frustration, that positive ideas come through, are noticed and then built upon.
Keep up the energy and pass the ammunition….
Comment by MurrayBacon — Fri 14th December 2018 @ 9:58 am