Mental health and our Teenage boys
Be aware; be very aware when you send your boys to Mental Health. I cannot stress enough that if you find yourself working with Mental Health insist on a male Psychiatrist or Psychologist for your boys. And be present for their interviews.
Do not let what I am going through be your story.
I approached Mental Health for my son as just like many parents especially single parents I was concerned for his behaviour and state of mind.
On one interview, my son stated that, “Girls dress up so young it is hard to know which of them is old enough to like and that sometimes he sees them in short skirts, heels, low tops and so on from behind, thinks sexually, then sees them front-on and realises they are too young.”
Never had I seen 2 women’s heads lift so fast and eyes light up and widen as if their Christmas had come early. “Hold on a minute”‘ I said. “It is normal for boys to have these thoughts in their teens.”
But the verdict was in and in writing. My son is a potential rapist. Now I will spend as long as it takes alongside all the other mother’s fighting this bias to clear my son’s name. I write letters to Mental Health but receive no replies. So, now my son is another statistic to show how young girls are unsafe. Another statistic for women’s refuge to use and alongside them their sister family violence.
My boys like many other boys you see around the streets are not with girls because girls have become a risk too great for young men to take on. It is such a shame for the girl’s are hurting too.
I visited a home where 4 boys were sitting in the lounge ignoring a group of girls that were knocking at the door. The father was a bit shocked and said, “Hey let them in, you’re young men.” But they wouldn’t and the girls gave up and left after some time. And there on the couch were cell phones and other bits and pieces the boys had received as gifts from the girls. But they are just not interested.
It is not just our teens that are hurting but our 20+ year olds. Make sure you watch SUNDAY tonight on channel 1 which is on our binge drinking young adults which just happens to affect females more than men. Once again you will see our males living in fear for their lives and the behaviour of our young women, the mother’s of yet another generation.
Do you know there was a time when male and females complimented each other? Boys would prefer to go to parties and night clubs where girls went. Not for sex but just for the fact the boys behaved better. There were fewer punch-ups between the males because the females mellowed the situation. Now fighting is rampant and it is not just the males.
I suppose that is the plan for our social government. Get Mental Health, CYFS, Police, Women’s Refuge and Family Violence (all heavily government funded and trained social workers, Psychiatrists and Psychologists) make all men and women equal by cutting males down to size and lifting females up to size, then once they are all animals drug them and make them dependant on every step of their lives to be under the control of today’s research opinionated education system and line the pockets of those who manipulated the best.
Never mind how unhappy the people will become. Never mind that maybe the people actually like the biological differences and to work, learn lessons and grow and so on and so on.
But I don’t want to leave you in fear that it is hopeless for our boys nor is it hopeless for you as parents.
Reach out in your neighbourhood for you WILL find there are more people going through these problems than you realise. Look for men’s groups in your local area. There is no-one who knows boys better than men. Phone the Youth Police division at your local police station. Phone CAB, Salvation Army, look over the internet or talk to the community counsellor at your boy’s school. But most of all listen to your teens even if you don’t like what they have to say. You as a parent have more power than you realise.
Mental Health is more reliant on research and research is bias. Hypothesises are chosen to compliment what the researcher wants to achieve not the TRUTH. Mental Health may medicate your boys initially to settle them. It is not the solution for the long-term. Community groups are more hands on, more life experienced and listen to the stories of the people.
We do not need to satisfy our anxieties by having all our boys labelled and certainly not in an unsafe environment which New Zealand has become where males have less rights than females.