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The Culture of Denial and Feminism

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 12:11 pm Thu 28th August 2014

When STUFF NATION put up their recent assignment, inviting writers to contribute to a debate on Equality in New Zealand (whether women have achieved equality in New Zealand society) I thought it might be interesting to look at this from the point of view of the background-role media play: whether media actually support equality of the sexes and which side of the equality debate they favour; accepting that equality is a collection of concepts as opposed to a defined word.

Media normally detest a culture of denial – it’s the noble cause of the journalist to be vigilant in the disclosure of truth for public consumption. In the face of war it can be somewhere between a challenging and fatal occupation, then at other times it throws up some interesting conflicts.

Home here in little old Aotearoa I’ve been watching National Party politician Judith Collins dig a rather large hole for herself; even after Collins has been forced by media to admit her misdeeds and misinformation, she stills clings by her fingertips to the cliffs of denial.

Our media have been ruthless in their pursuit, and rightfully so, but now ‘The Crusher’ as she became known for her hard-hitting stance on boy-racers, claims victim status.

The woman who might have been prime minister has taken that fatal step sideways from the brave new world of equality that offered her such a possibility into the murky realm of the Red-Fems; that sub-culture in which some women see themselves (and wish to be seen) as permanent victims in a man’s world.

Collins is not enhancing the image of female politicians, offering up a pretence that women should be allowed to deny responsibility – ‘sorry, this is not going to make it through the wash’ – is clearly the media position.

But then, this caught my eye this morning; where media may not see their own culture of denial.

Fort Lee Suicide

Soldier Who Shot Herself at Fort Lee Had Served for 13 Years, Including Iraq Tour

She didn’t miss either – it was a successful suicide.

It’s big news that a serving female soldier has killed herself; Sergeant Paula Walker will become a household name very quickly.

But what has been ignored for years has been increasing rates of male suicide in the US armed services. The body count for suicide on active duty is now higher than the casualty rate. The daily rate of suicide amongst active and non-active servicemen is 20 plus a day.

You may say that I am looking at this the wrong way around – that there was never a culture of denial – there is and always has been simply just an acceptance that men are disposable. But then as Sgt Walker has stepped into the traditionally male theatre of war, what makes her suicide any different?

Is it simply news that will make money or are media claiming the victim card of her behalf?

Or, oh hell – there must be something wrong here, female soldiers are now committing suicide – have we been missing something?

US servicemen have obviously not been at peace with themselves for some time now, and that’s failed to gain any major traction. It’s a truth that perhaps is conveniently denied on the basis that it is a necessary consequence for the survival of a society or is this too challenging and fatal for a journalist to go down this path and be at war with their home state.

Perhaps we shouldn’t dwell too much on the contradiction and be too quick to knock the publicity – this women’s suicide may have done us blokes a favour. That, I think, too often has been the false hope of similar reporting and begs questions of media.

Has equality become the convenience of the story, rather than truth the objective outcome?

Do media unwittingly apply different concepts of equality and leave the average man unrepresented and the victim of media discrimination?

So, let’s throw the analysis back at these guys – what are your thoughts on equality for men when it comes to media reporting?


  1. People see what they want to see or more precisely, they see what they look for, what they focus on, what they are trying to find. Most men and women haven’t got time to look for sexism but if you tell them they are being treated badly and go on and on about sexism, they start to look around to see if it’s real.

    Example: Jim and I were both using the hospital system and one day he said to me, “Nurses hate men”, or perhaps something similar with the same meaning. I said, “Nurses hate everyone equally”.

    Thing is, nurses don’t really hate anyone, they care for people who are very sick. On a hospital floor, they are given a room full of 4 or more patients and a room with one patient needing special care. It’s a lot to care for and they stretch nurses like teachers, social worker, heck, now WINZ staff, and it makes the job very stressful.

    On many, many days and nights, a nurse on a hospital floor gets sick themselves and that means the other nurses have to divide up the sick nurses work. Perhaps they aren’t sick, perhaps they have a baby sitting problem, or a sick child, or a death in the family…. just like every other job parents work.

    Now the job is twice as stressful. All they need is one patient to demand more that their share, or an emergency on the ward, and they are even more stressed and likely to snap when patients are pressing their little buzzers, “oh, nurse, can I have….”, “oh, nurse, can you…”, … you get it.

    Comment by julie — Thu 28th August 2014 @ 10:33 pm

  2. My experience with the media since National got into power is soooo bad, that I refuse to give the media a single parent. I have had the sweet talk, and the promises, but I can’t risk it for the media are ruthless.

    Sunday Star Times – no way
    Stuff – absolutely not
    Auckland local papers – uh, uh. They are run by fairfax and the editors are at war. They are using anyone they can to play this ‘deadly’ game. Not even the CEO has ethics when it comes to news or gossip.

    They lie…. and sadly, I can’t trust anyone.


    I am aware the same is being done to men. It’s because they are at each other. Michael Laws is obvious while others are discreet. Michael Laws says that the media attack him because he says things about them….. That’s New Zealand media in a nutshell.

    Comment by julie — Thu 28th August 2014 @ 10:44 pm

  3. No, there is no equality for men. Men are 2nd class tax slaves in this feminazi society, and the media is an integral part of feminist anti-male propaganda.

    It seems women do not care about men apart from what they can get from them. It seems men are by nature competitive: for resources, for pecking order, for women; which tends to make them less empathetic towards other men too.

    The media is a reflection of society with a strong element of government policy too.
    Government policy for the last 20 years in particular since Rogernomics has been for a selfish society with a heavy dose of anti-male feminism. This has increased the lack of sentiment towards the suffering of men, as government feminist propaganda has portrayed men (other than those in positions of power and government) as the perpetrators and cause of all the ills in society especially the feminist construct of ‘domestic violence’. Used to just be called violence but government & feminists discovered if they could re-categorise violence then they could also redefine it to mean whatever a women said. So they added psychological violence and financial violence and invented a thing called the ‘Protection’ Order which allowed the females and government to make huge money from this industry they had set up. Of course at the expense of men and children, while pretending they are doing it all for the children! It’s normally called a con job if the government is not involved.

    Men are, and have always been, expendable cannon fodder. Men are the caring and nurturing sex. So much so that they willingly lay down their lives for women and children. Only to be back-stabbed by that same woman when she no longer wants or needs him, or is going through menopause.

    Then she will invariably wait until she gets a back up plan before backstabbbing her present man, literally and /or figuratively.

    Almost all women seem too selfish to love selflessly (which is true love), Most men do love selflessly and for life.

    This is proven by the fact that 90% of marriages are broken up by women. Often driving men to suicide in order to get their all of relationship property. Means, motive and opportunity. The fact that men are more broken by a break-up proves that they had more emotion invested in it.
    Telling someone to commit suicide is far worse than saying “I’ma gonna kill u!” therefore telling someone to kill themselves should be a crime.

    I have some ideas about how to reverse this untenable state of dog eat dog but first men and women have to realise their is a problem and 2nd they have to want to fix it. Government anti-male and anti children laws are a huge part of the problem.

    Comment by Phil Watts — Fri 29th August 2014 @ 10:42 am

  4. Hi Phil,

    I am making comment to selected pieces of your comment. Please don’t think this is personal, for it’s not. I am wanting to add a bit of information from my head. You come across as a very caring father, which is awesome.

    Men are 2nd class tax slaves in this feminazi society

    This is good. Finding where men miss out as consumers is part of solving the problem, IMO, though it’s difficult to say ‘ALL men’ when we have nationality interest groups speaking up and lobbying for their slice of the pie (tax resource) because they cover both men and women. Still, men are an interest group.

    As a woman who believes we should have worker’s benefits (spoke to a retired man today who worked in health. He says they had a good retirement package when he was working), I prefer the men (and women) that want to see money flowing out into the community than men (and women) who want to pay less taxes and live under ‘the fittest survive’ rule. (there must be a balance so people also look after themselves when capable, IMO)

    Looking at the effects of men’s past and current complaints/awareness, you see a lot more money is being spent on men’s issues these days. National has been very good for men, IMO.


    If anyone wants to help men as a [consumer] interest group, there are many men in the system who are in a position to get more resources from government that need support. Simple lobbying will do, that is, writing official letters which is just emails these days (much easier than what they had to do years ago because you can BCC it to all interested parties at the same time). Contact people associated with “Men’s health” to find out what you can do to help, IMO.

    Men are, and have always been, expendable cannon fodder.

    Very true and very sad. I also see women have always been expendable incubators and used for sexual pleasure. My father-in-law says his family fought for a king, lost, went back home to breed more sons, went back to war, lost again, went home to breed more sons, and on it went.

    Women were spoils of war and while the European/Transatlantic slave trade took 3 men for every 2 woman, the Arab slave trade took 2 women for every man.

    Men are the caring and nurturing sex.

    There’s a family movie (cartoon), very well done, that opens the mind to a future that’s entirely different from the nuclear family and depicts men as ‘cuddling and nurturing’. It’s called, “Mars needs mums” or moms. It’s got well known actors and very smart writers, etc.

    So much so that they willingly lay down their lives for women and children.

    As a single mother, I can relate to the children part. 🙂

    Comment by julie — Fri 29th August 2014 @ 7:35 pm

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