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Wanted: A new Partner ….

Filed under: General — OMG! you're f%^^&*($@#! @ 7:54 pm Thu 10th July 2014

Like most men, I seek an intimate relationship with a woman.
Unfortunately, I am family court tainted, and seek only a woman who is fully my equal.
Equal. Similar age; similar education and qualifications; similar income; similar asset base; similar debt ratio; similar religion; similar criminal history (i.e. none); similar driving habits (i.e. rarely receives any infringements etc); similar work history and hours; similar financial contribution to all things; similar physical contribution to all household chores. [I accept doing “half’ the housework. I accept her doing “half’ the lawns and maintenance (there’s a “Tui’ ad in that somewhere)]. I accept equal input into decision making (which on the law of averages, means sometimes you get your way, sometimes you don’t. Consensus is perfect). I like a woman who is not ‘butch’, yet is willing to change a tyre.
I have a thing about the “gotta-have’ spenders. Fashion isn’t important. You do not need to spend everything on clothes. I am anti-credit; and sadly will not cohabit with a spend-on-credit woman. I have a thing about obesity; and will not accept the “larger’ models. I am not Mr Universe; and don’t expect Miss Universe either. But sorry, looks do count. And I don’t do screamers. You want a shouting match? Tell you what. I’m outta there before you finish the second one.
I do not accept shared bank accounts etc. So let’s make a deal. What’s yours is yours; what’s mine is mine. You can have and keep everything you earn. Me too. Separate accounts. Lets split all shared expenses (which includes mortgage and maintenance, and purchase of major assets), roughly 50/50.
Now I have my friends, my hobbies; I have my space, my man-cave. Any potential partner is welcome to her own friends, hobbies space, woman-cave. This is not controlling. It does not worry me at all, what she does or has. But I will not cede my “fun’.
Of course, I know my chance of securing a normal intimate relationship based on all of the above is less than zero. Welcome to reality.


  1. I should add, I can’t stand friggin feminists. Please don’t apply. My refusal will only offend you.
    And (in case explanation is needed,), ‘similar’ means – I don’t know – maybe +/- 10% variance, where mathematical variance is possible.
    Got children? looking for a father? Move on please. They have a father. Engage with him. I’m not filling a gap on your whim.

    Comment by OMG! you're f%^^&*($@#! — Thu 10th July 2014 @ 7:59 pm

  2. Hard luck, one could do a statistical analysis but I suspect your chances approach zero. I suggest you modify your “requirements” somewhat with 50%+/- variance and let her do the same for her requirements [50% variance] and you never know. For example income 10% variance is very small when one remembers females earn on average 30% less than males [I could be wrong about this figure].

    Comment by andrew — Thu 10th July 2014 @ 8:35 pm

  3. Its about equality, Andrew. How the fck can you be ‘equal’ when significant variances exist? Money – especially money – is power. How often have we heard that?
    Ok, so you want to give a little on that. Fair call. Let her contribute that much less financially into the relationship. If – when – it falls apart, she will claim half of everything – and be awarded it (as a minimum) despite only ever contributing her lesser financial contribution. Man (me) will never get credit for the larger financial contribution.
    And for the higher income set (which includes me), the differences are even greater. I earn – somewhere between 100 and 150K. Am I gonna hook up with an ‘average’ 40k salary gal? Hell no. The terms ‘kept women’ (aka gold-digger) springs to mind.
    Once past ‘long-term’ relationship – it probably cost me $1,000 per ‘night’ with her when she walked away with half of my ‘assets’. A prozzie would have been cheaper.

    Comment by OMG! you're f%^^&*($@#! — Thu 10th July 2014 @ 8:44 pm

  4. There is a reason that you are single, and a reason that you will stay that way.
    The type of woman you are looking for, can do WAY better than you….

    Comment by SkyMaiden — Thu 10th July 2014 @ 10:17 pm

  5. Sorry OMG.
    Even with all the honorable pledges towards equality you make in your “Wanted” article, “you can NEVER be equal” to any woman in feminist NZ.
    Any potential female partner has a HUGE amount of power more than you. Sorry, i understated that, I meant to say not just more than you but OVER YOU.
    To whit, the pussy pass – she has legions of angry female feminists (and unconscious chivalrist males ready to do proxy violence to you on her behalf) at her first show of ‘damsel in distress’.
    Never mind that she may be pumping out crocodile tears, you’re dog tucker buddy.
    Even if she gets feral on you and you manage to get the powers that be to interject on your behalf, let alone recognize her abusiveness to you she’ll most likely get let off scott-free, AND she knows it.
    These legions also range from the average Joe in the street right through to a Labor candidate for Prime Minister! He wants to apologize because you committed the heinous sin of being born male!!!

    As if that isn’t bad enough, it doesn’t stop there.
    She has plenty of purple media (feminists favorite color) and it’s evil sister purple academia solidly behind her, both continuously pumping toxic misandric memes into the atmosphere to sully things for you, ever ready and willing to demonize NZ males at every available opportunity.
    All of the above firmly entrenched by precedents set spanning several decades now and amply recorded in the archives of this site.

    My dear friend, If I were in your shoes I’d do one of two things.
    Find a woman who is both publicly and very actively a Men’s Rights Activist.
    I mean a woman who really walks the walk, not just talks the talk. A woman who blogs AND attends meetings in support of men’s rights, who confronts BOTH the media and politicians fearlessly because she believes in true equality between the sexes – not merely the feminist bullshit female-entitlement version.
    The alternative to not being able to find such a woman in NZ (highly likely IMO) is to do as John Dutchie has done.
    Move to a non-feminist country and get together with a non-feminist woman.
    Please be aware though that come 2016 Hillary Clinton has plans to change all of that scenario.
    Both being of the left, she might even get David Cunliffe to attend her presidential inauguration in something ravishing and pink to show what kind of supportive man he is.

    Good luck.

    Comment by Skeptik — Thu 10th July 2014 @ 10:29 pm

  6. Contrary to others, I think you’re realistic, if a little blunt 😉 I had a similar wish list when I was looking for a bloke. We’re now 5yrs into a great relationship, collectively earn over $300k, blended with 6 kids, and share chores. Those chores we don’t like, we pay someone else to do. Don’t give up hope!

    Comment by Chick — Fri 11th July 2014 @ 10:40 am

  7. @#Chick: I agree. I am in similar situation as you. There are people out there who understand the Fem@le Caught BS and what it means in the “real world” and how skewed or Conservative are in their decisions. Don’t worry about the so called “taint”. You will get there.

    Comment by Kumar — Fri 11th July 2014 @ 11:53 am

  8. Here’s a couple of ideas. Talk to her ex if you can, he’s seen a side she’s not showing you yet. Ask her if she knows who Kate Sheppard is – it’s fine if she knows that means she’s smart but the question should bring out any extreme feminist thoughts she has. If she’s too enthusiastic in her reply then just run. Or the best of all, suggest a pre-nup and check her reaction.
    In the unlikely event that any women are reading this you can try these things too.

    Comment by Daniel — Fri 11th July 2014 @ 1:11 pm

  9. As Kim Dotcom has learned, Asian brides don’t necessarily value families or prioritize the emotional needs of their children over their own selfish wishes.

    Comment by Man X Norton — Fri 11th July 2014 @ 1:20 pm

  10. To those MGTOWs, remember it’s not safe even to pay prostitutes to help with your sexual needs. At present, it’s safe to use legal pornography, but the feminist groups can see the extent to which pornography is threatening women’s power over men and are working constantly to demonize men’s indulgence in all visual and fantasy methods of arousal. So don’t be surprised if one day soon your Playboy and Penthouse collection in the garage is made illegal by one of our feminist-beguiled governments. Such magazines are, I believe, already seized by authorities and used as evidence that you are a misogynist and therefore must be guilty of whatever some woman has accused you of.

    The feminist net around all things male is tightening. Don’t imagine as a man that you will be able to meet any of your needs in any way that does not benefit women or doesn’t meet their full approval.

    Comment by Man X Norton — Fri 11th July 2014 @ 1:36 pm

  11. I should add that a pre-nuptial is essential.
    Of course, I have no faith in these. They’re simply a licence for lawyers to print money as the offer to ‘crack’ a pre-nup in order to take a guy to the cleaners.
    But will seeking out a partner with similar asset base, debt ration, income etc, there becomes nothing much to be lost, if a pre-nup is cracked, given 9 times out of 10, they’re only gonna get half my stuff.

    Comment by OMG! you're f%^^&*($@#! — Fri 11th July 2014 @ 5:25 pm

  12. Chick says (my words in brackets) –

    Contrary to others, I think you’re realistic (when I gloss over the fact I can render him evicted and childless just for starters with a mere single phone call claiming he’s abusive),
    if a little blunt 😉 (OMG! A blunt male! You made the sin of straight up stating expectations!
    How dare you be so blunt! You’re on this earth to worship and serve women don’tchaknow?
    Just when did you start thinking you’d left the plantation?!)
    I had a similar wish list when I was looking for a bloke (But I won’t share it here so I’m basically blowing hot air).
    We’re now 5yrs into a great relationship (according to my hypergamous agenda), collectively earn over $300k (Great! If I decide to screw him over in the femily caught, being the female I’m in for an enormous payout!!!), blended with 6 kids (I also get child support from my Ex – Life is so sweeeeet!), and share chores (I do the nice safe indoors stuff, he’s relegated to the dirty dangerous outdoors stuff in ALL weathers). Those chores we don’t like, we pay someone else to do. Don’t give up hope (Be that Beta!)!

    Now Chick, you may refute everything I’ve hypothesized here as being totally cynical baloney.
    However the fact remains your ‘other’ isn’t here to speak for himself.
    So your words mean precisely zero.
    FYI this website is as the banner says here to be “promoting a clearer understanding of MEN’S experience”

    My apologies if you’re a man called Chick.
    In which case I respectfully suggest changing you’re name to something less feminine.

    Comment by Skeptik — Fri 11th July 2014 @ 11:27 pm

  13. I was being funny. Or trying to be. Hence the 😉
    I get no child support.
    I just wanted to let you guys know there is hope. Nothing more, nothing less.
    I hope you have a daughter who can melt the hatred you have against women, Skeptic.

    Comment by Chick — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 3:03 pm

  14. I have a awesome daughter who I am “allowed” to see some times, despite having a parenting order stating otherwise and a family court judge who refuses to uphold this court order. Despite this i have no objections to paying for my share of my child’s upbringing as this is for my daughter not for my ex. What the main issue is looking back that I dared to try to get “ahead” financially, trying to make a better situation for myself and my family through my hard work and savings.
    This is then undone overnight by a female who decides she wants to do something else and splits up the family unit, then proceeds to do unthinkable things to the male partner with advice from a legal person for the sole purpose to try and stop the father from seeing his own daughter.
    This type of behavior has lasting effects on ones memory and will always sway future decisions about any future female partner and what they are capable of with the aid of n.z. law.

    Comment by binga — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 8:14 pm

  15. Chick,
    I see you’re upset that I called you out on trying to tell men here what to experience on a site which is for ‘promoting a clearer understanding of MEN’S experience’.
    Now your condescendingly assert you know me to be a a woman hater.
    Any more advice for us mere males?

    Comment by Skeptik — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 9:07 pm

  16. A male expresses a wish list. I said it wasn’t unrealistic. Not sure what the problem is but no further advice, no 🙂

    Comment by Chick — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 9:16 pm

  17. Chick says

    Contrary to others, I think you’re realistic, if a little blunt 😉

    Realistic at what point? knowing I’m damned unlikely to ever find an ‘equal’ across every more or less measurable spectrum? Thanks for confirming that.
    I think I concur with SkyMaiden:

    There is a reason that you are single, and a reason that you will stay that way.
    The type of woman you are looking for, can do WAY better than you

    Actually, in being so dismissive, SkyMaiden is actually quite truthful and revealing: Women with assets and wealth and power, are not hooking up with men. They accepted the feminist mantra ‘girls can do anything’ (later revised in action, if not in word, to ‘girls must do everything’), and on that basis, they have no need for traditional hetero-sexual relationships.They tend to hand on to their assets within lesbian relationships. They have no interest in sharing power and assets and wealth. They are happy to ‘marry up’; but not to share or ‘marry-down’.
    What women didn’t quite realise, is that long term, they’re not actually any better off.

    Comment by OMG! you're f%^^&*($@#! — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 9:33 pm

  18. Chick,
    Actually you said his wish list was realistic, now your denying that. Duh!

    Are you sure you don’t want to give out more unsolicited advice about how we men should be?

    Perhaps you have some great ideas on how to deal with men’s lack of human rights in New Zealand?
    You know, stuff you being a woman can take for granted like due process and fair treatment under feminist law?

    Also, How does it feel knowing you can screw your husband over royally with a mere dramarama phone call resulting in a fem goon-squad coming to crush him if he doesn’t tow the line?

    Comment by Skeptik — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 9:47 pm

  19. Really, really good.

    Comment by Chick — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 10:06 pm

  20. Skeptik – Chick said “I think you’re realistic”.
    Then she said “I said it wasn’t unrealistic”
    She also stated “melt the hatred you have against women” You derided her, saying “your condescendingly assert you know me to be a a woman hater”
    And finally you challenge Chick stating “Actually you said his wish list was realistic, now your denying that”.

    Actually, you’re tripping yourself up in your efforts to shoot down any woman who says anything here: Chick saying “I said it wasn’t unrealistic” is not a denial of herself saying “I think you’re realistic”. I agree with Chick. You have problems listening to, or even letting women express themselves. You seem pre-occupied in simply attacking them.

    Comment by Michelle — Sat 12th July 2014 @ 10:07 pm

  21. Chick,
    My apology for misreading the realistic/unrealistic words.
    However, everything else I stand by.

    If you’d bother to search through the many postings I’ve made here instead of gobbing off prematurely and judgmentally making me out to be some anti-women demon you’d see many of the comments I’ve made here on this site are supportive of women.
    (Here’s just one woman I’ve posted about I admire greatly –
    Can you be adult enough to go look for those posts yourself to dispel your false accusation.
    Having done a site search can you then be as adult as I have and offer an apology for mischaracterizing me?
    We’ll see.

    Anyway, I’ll keep continuing to challenge any women who comes here trying to tell men how to be.
    If I get called a woman hater for doing so I’ll just take that as further evidence they can’t handle being told by a man that they have no place trying to pressure them to live up to women’s expectations.
    What part of MENZ is for “promoting a clearer understanding of men’s experience” don’t you women get?
    Would you feel OK with me visiting a site designed to promote a clearer understanding of WOMEN’s experience and patronizingly trying to tell women how to be? I think not.
    If you have a problem with my attitude here, tough.

    Come to think of it it’s disgusting to accuse me of having poor reading skills when coming here and NOT EVEN BEING BEING ABLE TO READ THE SITE’S BANNER PROPERLY – “promoting a clearer understanding of men’s experience”.
    Holy shit! Talk about the pot calling the kettle black! Face palm.

    “How does it feel knowing you can screw your husband over royally with a mere dramarama phone call resulting in a fem goon-squad coming to crush him if he doesn’t tow the line?”

    Chick says:
    Sat 12th July 2014 at 10:06 pm
    “Really, really good.”

    Seems like the hater here is Chick eh?.

    Comment by Skeptik — Sun 13th July 2014 @ 2:22 am

  22. u got it Skeptic #21 in your last line, that sums up most females to a t.

    they are narcissists – just log onto any psych check and do the survey as if ur any woman u know and they will almost invariably be labelled a narcissist. they believe the world exists for their benefit and their benefit only. they do not value their children except as a status symbol and companion or toy to be brainwashed into the feminist sisterhood.
    Mothers brainwash male & female alike along with the massive media anti-male brainwashing.

    Very hard to combat that much anti-male propaganda. they are such narcissists they may not even realise they are doing it.

    Comment by Sane in an insane world. — Sun 13th July 2014 @ 11:51 am

  23. I have never read such overreacting rubbish. I’m ‘chick’s partner. I wouldn’t have my kids if she hadn’t helped my through court, self representing. I agree with her re the wish list that started this thread – it’s realistic. Time you stopped dwelling on the bad past and thinking positive about the future. Most men I know would be ashamed if you drama queens were a true reflection on men’s understanding. I want nothing to do with this site if this is what it’s about. Good luck to you, we’re happy, that’s all that matters to me.

    Comment by Mumanddadofsix — Sun 13th July 2014 @ 12:53 pm

  24. Mumanddadofsix,
    I don’t think it’s an overreaction to state a fact: this site is for –

    ‘promoting a clearer understanding of men’s experience’. What part of that don’t you understand?

    Women like your partner coming here should bear that in mind. It’s disrespectful of them to try using a men’s space arrogantly and selfishly as a platform to try shaping male behavior in self serving gynocentric ways. We get plenty of that in popular culture as it is. I repeat – your partners advice giving was uncalled for and condescending.

    You also talk as though I’m dwelling on a bad past and should move on. face-palm.
    I think you overlook something that is completely obvious to folks in my community.
    The matters I talk of in this thread and elsewhere on this site (lack of human rights for men, gynocentric feminist culture, female hypergamy etc) aren’t some historical aberration that no longer exists. Good grief! They are all current forces having a terrible effect upon men and boys in New Zealand.
    Sorry you don’t seem to see that.
    Good grief. The leader of Labor wants to do away with due process under the law for men, and I could go on as to me that’s just the tip of the iceberg. An iceberg which you appear awfully ignorant about.
    Instead of getting more educated about men’s issues you expend your energy instead in white knightly fashion name-calling me and others who share a similar analysis here “drama queens”.
    Do you really think such pathetic insults are going to convince us you have a truer view of matters?
    That’s just a kind of emotional behavior that’s used vainly to try and shut down conversation – to which I say “Tough for you. I stand firm by everything I’ve said here. If that’s not to your liking then you’re free to follow your own path, and good luck to you too”.

    Comment by Skeptik — Sun 13th July 2014 @ 3:08 pm

  25. Mumanddadofsix,
    Addendum – I almost forgot to add something:

    #18 Skeptic:
    ‘How does it feel knowing you can screw your husband over royally with a mere dramarama phone call resulting in a fem goon-squad coming to crush him if he doesn’t tow the line?’

    #19 Chick says:
    Sat 12th July 2014 at 10:06 pm
    ‘Really, really good.’

    Comment by Skeptik — Sun 13th July 2014 @ 3:14 pm

  26. Hey, apart from the usual someone on their rags must talk crap banter above, no names needed really, what’s wrong with this, is it not fair or equal ??? but yes I get its not a fair world but when do you meet that person and you will , make sure you recognize them and stay with them as they really are worth it, they are out there you will find them, My partner doesn’t have a lot of $ but not only does she help with everything she helps with understanding of what I have been through and its a trade off with understanding and not being a gold digging piece of trailer trash, like many shallow idiots out there.

    Comment by Dominic da Silva — Wed 16th July 2014 @ 4:13 pm

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