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how to proceed with my case ?

Filed under: General,Law & Courts — kidless dad @ 2:17 pm Wed 26th February 2020

this started off with a without notice application based on violence and drug use also citing child neglect and untidy living conditions (majorly played up for maximum effect) i held onto my daughter for a week over our informal arrangements due to being threatened to never see her again, police did an uplift after an incident where the mother tried to take my daughter by force, i am currently on supervised visits with my daughter 2 hours weekly (other excluded because not biological for added psychological abuse). i have proof of all lies told on initial affidavit including the said violence and drug use also child neglect wasn’t even worth mentioning because its total bs . The mother has failed her drug test and returned a massive reading for marijuana, OT have made a report and say they have no concerns about having my daughters in my care. i passed mine with no drugs, i have started a parenting program and completed pts course . We have a directions hearing in a week or 2 the mother hasnt complied with any conditions on the parenting order and i have done everything but i am not sure my lawyer is acting in my interests as she seems rather lack luster about the outcomes ahead . Can anyone shine a light on this dark situation. Please and Thank you


  1. Hello Kidless Dad,,, I hope you have had some help since your post, if not, or you need some advice before the Directions Hearing, look up Frank at Guardians of Our Children, they hold workshops to help prepare for court processes but also can offer advice more immediately.

    Comment by mama — Tue 3rd March 2020 @ 11:55 am

  2. Hi, Ift appears you made a huge mistake by not returning your daughter previously.
    If her lawyer is good, they will use it to delay-delay-delay and try to create a new status quo.
    They will try to torpedo your every chance to be reunited with your daughter by saying your conduct put your child in harm’ way. And that she may even have been traumatized by the police intervention (which no one else caused but you – in the eyes of the law).
    IT seems also your lawyer might be trying to rebuild you personne into a compliant parent who is child focused and whom now, so far, has shined through every step and passed every required test.
    So the passed drugs test and the parenting classes are your ammunition …you are doing the ground work. Keep up with the good work and have faith, it does sound like your lawyer knows what he is doing…It seems he is building your castle for you and you are the labourer and home owner.
    You have not lost your head and have kept your cool…persevere and you will succeed. But watch your lawyer like a hawk and talk to him. He must tell you what his strategy is and why before you engage in any line of conduct towards the reunification betweenm you and your daughter before any action is taken.

    Comment by JustCurious — Tue 10th March 2020 @ 1:14 pm

  3. “IT seems also your lawyer might be trying to rebuild you personne into a compliant parent who is child focused and whom now, so far, has shined through every step and passed every required test.” From number 2, JustCurious.

    Who be this man that must change himself to pass through the eye of the needle.
    Surely he would be the richest of men.
    Surely he must be the most perfect of men.
    Is he no longer himself now that he changed.
    Surely he be the same man, just pretending to be another.
    Who be it that judges the eye of the needle.
    Does it change to fit each man, our does the man change to fit each eye.
    Surely every human judge sees the world through a different eye.
    There is no test yet the human judge desires to test all men.
    Can you not see by his words that he be a good man.
    That he try to be good, while others try to show him to be bad.
    Who be this man that must bow to the will of others.
    Slave I say.
    Only a free man can stand his ground and not fear judgement.

    Comment by DJ Ward — Sun 22nd November 2020 @ 7:29 am

  4. Keep it as simple as possible. As short as possible, as economic as possible. Try not to play in trouble on other side.

    I found all lawyer’s difficult to read.
    Reality is they will make out there is something so expert about what they do. There’s not. Its how they make that out, as if it is.

    It is not rocket science really, its just if you ate vulnerable then you feel you need support so you look yo them.

    In my experience I’m far better at contracts than these people I was paying thousands of dollars to. Other side didn’t fall into the trap of need trap of full time lawyers. Ask around, weigh up your circumstances.

    If u happy footing huge fees and have less confidence than others, then its good decision to pay. If you don’t have the time, I see the point. If lawyet for child on file then you kind of lucky, as thats a good mediator. Just do all the best things that makes a good safe caring parent. Kick drugs, get high on life. As hair folical test anytime evidences drug use history.

    If you have time, then templates all online now a days.

    Work out the best parenting plan that would suit you make as many hardcovers through schools so independent away from other parent. Other hand overs under CCTV public location. Less allegations. Less finanical burns on fees in long run. Step up take control. Wheb report writer visits, I had no idea you could take kids across road up road to park with report writer. Do that move, it puts you ahead on the write up. Why ever these lawyers are keeping it as if its an unknown science is beneath reason. Make no sense why all these skills of parenting separation and how yo break up well, without conflict aren’t being taught in schools to mature teenagers. Like an a plan and process of what would be acceptable behavior in society, when children are involved. It all flys into fear for each parent. Nz Teach family units more, have more free suggestions on good parenting plans available. I never saw a parenting plan till like 9 months into paying lawyers. It was all like so custom and nothing readily available to show clients. Like secret KFC recipe.

    They go from over promising to
    lack Lustre and everything in between.
    There focus is really on their achievements,
    not the client’s in many instances.

    Parenting centre. Update do like 3 per year is great help. likely good as courses 2 days 3 days. Learn lots. Those stand out. Push through.
    Stay clean, your children need that.

    Comment by Family Court parenting plan were being treated like secret KFC recipe, till you had traveled the costly road and paid for far too many affidavits. Like over 100 paragraph ones. Judges did not like that. — Tue 24th November 2020 @ 11:36 pm

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