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The Psychology of Modern Woman

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 3:50 pm Mon 19th March 2018

There are many relationships within the social contract that might be analysed from a psychological perspective.

In this age and led by the media we generally see society analyzed from women’s perspective.

Naturally there is an audience, but perhaps also a quiet audience whose thoughts are theirs but whose voices are not being heard.

49 Comments »

  1. We have this social problem of domestic violence, according to feminists- all violence is a male construct and when females are violent towards each other or violent to their partners or children it can only be a learned behaviour, learned from a male of course.

    It doesn’t matter what the field is psychology or otherwise all students will be taught about patriarchy theory and told that women have been oppressed and diminished for centuries and only their needs should be worth considering.
    This is always followed through with “So that’s why I’m a feminist, because I believe in eak-walllity”.
    Of course what they mean is equality -for women.
    Patriarchy theory has been so successful that most of those who have been force fed the snake oil have fully fallen to the witches spell.
    They have convinced the masses that the means to equality is to uphold one persons worthiness over another.
    Egalitarianism is unnecessary, the streets are crawling each evening with women and children escaping male violence, we must punish our men so they can learn to worship our chosen,- more worthy citizens.

    a) put as many men in prison as we can.
    b) make sure its more than we put in last year.
    c) congratulate ourselves for our achievements.

    Comment by voices back from the bush. — Mon 19th March 2018 @ 3:58 pm

  2. @1 Congratulate themselves on their achievements.

    You get sick of hearing about it.

    You notice when this happens in Parliament no matter how much collateral damage is trailing behind male MPs will sit there like a bunch of wanking idiots who don’t speak the same language.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Tue 20th March 2018 @ 10:15 am

  3. Julie Anne Genter said today that ‘old white men’ should move on from company boards because it would help make way for more women and improve the gender pay gap.

    Mindless arrogant little silly bitches shouldn’t be politicians, then we wouldn’t have to read this crap in the news.

    Maybe Jacindarella’s father should be removed as the Administrator of Tokelau – he’s an old white man.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Fri 23rd March 2018 @ 5:07 am

  4. Evan Myers @3. Incredible isn’t it? It seems to be ok to treat men with sexism and this case racism and ageism, when any similar comment would be considered unacceptable concerning any other group.

    Comment by Ministry of Men's Affairs — Fri 23rd March 2018 @ 7:51 am

  5. I recall Roger McClay (a previous childrens commissioner) supporting some Feminist dribble about making Fathers Day a ‘National Day of Shame’.

    His offsider told me “He knew by morning tea he’d made a mistake.”

    If Susan Devoy can’t get off her ideological arse over this one, then it will be a very good indication that there is rot in more than just our hospital buildings.

    Comment by Downunder — Fri 23rd March 2018 @ 9:39 am

  6. Unfortunately it seems that our unreliable journalists have misquoted Ms Genter, allowing white knights like Paul Little to shovel more ridicule upon men. Interesting tactic.

    Comment by Ministry of Men's Affairs — Sun 1st April 2018 @ 10:55 am

  7. Debate may be too noble a word to describe the level of blather that ensued in the wake of Minister for Women Julie Anne Genter’s remarks about old white men.

    However, ensue it did, and I feel that as a white man in his 60s I am qualified to add my tuppence-worth.

    We start off suggesting that what old white men are saying is irrational and irrelevant except for me because I support the political cause.

    I can’t think of much worse than being trapped in a room populated by my demographic.

    In my experience, they share characteristics inimical to creative thinking and problem solving.

    Chief among them is an unshakeable conviction they know best.

    About everything.

    And they don’t mind you knowing they do.

    Then we conclude that old white men are all racist except me, inept at the creativity and problem solving, that we want so much to be included in because we can’t do it for ourselves.

    And by the way you’re not allowed to defend your opinion, because we think we should just get our way.

    If you went through and took out all the emotive claptrap, there’s not much substance left, but that as we discussed recently is Feminist journalism.

    Comment by Downunder — Sun 1st April 2018 @ 12:11 pm

  8. You can write this rubbish, and you be irresponsible and print it but when you’re in the room and one of those idiots spouts forth and you just cringe because you know the person next and their Maori or Polynesian partner.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Sun 1st April 2018 @ 1:13 pm

  9. The psychology of 50 plus New Zealand woman according my experience :

    1. Most of them don’t like strong men who have loud masculine voice .

    A strong man = man with traditional clear boundaries, with clear and particular principles , without PC or other B/S , a man who calls the spade a spade ; who laughs loudly and sincerely , et etc You got the picture

    Comment by GEORGE SIMONOVSKI — Mon 2nd April 2018 @ 7:51 pm

  10. Principles cause a conflict with the liberal aspects of Feminism.

    Then again you never know what you are going get from menopausal women anyway.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Tue 3rd April 2018 @ 4:01 pm

  11. These comments re “old White men” are about the same men who in previous generations went to war and gave their lives so that ignorant jumped up little woman like this “Minister for Woman” can exist and make these comments in a role other than a “Comfort Girl” as happened to other women in occupied countries.

    This jumped up little twat should take a good look at the “old tarnished women in the family court process” and get rid of them.

    Comment by Brad — Sat 7th April 2018 @ 3:11 pm

  12. I hate feminists, if woman want equal rights they would have to allow the father 50:50 from birth instead of the way it is now. I spent my life savings on a parenting order and now my son is 3 and wants to spend more and more time with dadda so she can pull stunts like he is sick, he is staying home this weekend… my blood boils knowing she is working on alienating him as she has since day one. So now I have to take time off work ruining my job to fill and sign forms to th family courts. While she sits unemployed milking it. I pay child support and he is my son yet this system is bias from day one. Furious

    Comment by KYLE ESLER — Fri 13th April 2018 @ 7:11 pm

  13. KYLE ESLER @12: Yes, the majority of men experience the system as biased against men and exploitative of men. Although many feminists (femaleists) claim they want their children’s fathers to be more involved and contributing with the children, it’s dangerous for fathers to become emotionally attached to their children because women are more likely than not to break up the family whereupon they usually seize the children and leave the father in terrible pain, on top of which the father is financially damaged or ruined by being made to pay for the disloyal woman’s lifestyle. As the women work to shut the father out of the children’s lives, one of the few options the father is left with is to try to deal with the Femily Court where he will experience nasty sexism, lies, disrespect, unfairness, tricks and economic plunder all welcomed and much of it actively practised by the Court. That’s why some of us men have been protesting outside Femily Courts and telling the truth on sites such as this. Be strong and keep all options open including walking away from the whole circus before it permanently wrecks you.

    Comment by Man X Norton — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 8:43 am

  14. I already have a parenting order and a great relationship with my son, I downloaded all the documents and am just going to file the breach of parenting order and not use a lawyer. It looks like I may have a shot out getting even more custody than just having my son in the weekends. I can never walk away and I don’t mind battling for what is right.

    Comment by KYLE — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 9:25 am

  15. A business suit, a brief case and a newspaper under your arm can be a good disguise when you walk into a court house with a casually dressed civilian. I acknowledged that the register was alone and looked busy.

    She told me how bad it was.

    The others couldn’t handle what was going on and had all resigned.
    There were only two of them left.
    The other was away sick and she was all alone.
    She’d asked for help.
    But ‘they’ wouldn’t send anyone to help.
    And she was expected to just do it all by herself.

    I looked stern and nodded until her grievance had expired then told her who I was and how she could help us.

    There was a stunned silence and a desperate face to match as she realized …
    I wasn’t a legal worker.
    I wasn’t even a Joe blogs.

    She’d just spilt her guts to ‘one of those guys’.

    The Family Court was a desperate place during the last Labour Coalition. There will be expectations on ordinary people to comply with the same legal and political bullshit.

    Don’t expect it to be easy.

    Comment by Bevan Berg — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 9:39 am

  16. Good on you Kyle!

    Comment by Man X Norton — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 10:25 am

  17. Yes. Good on him!

    But let’s not have the poor chap under any illusion that the courts are likely to be

    Fair
    Helpful
    Reasonable

    And that team work is more successful than struggling in isolation.

    Comment by Bevan Berg — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 11:05 am

  18. It is never easy in that circus but I guess I got a good judge who could see right through the mother of my son. I am looking forward to getting in the ring again

    Comment by Kyle — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 11:50 am

  19. This is precisely the problem with alienation.

    The mother thrives on the attention.
    The crusade that has you at her finger tips just for fun.
    The increasing pile of court documents that will later be held up to your child as evidence of you hurting her.
    The courts take no responsibility for the financial and emotional damage of their continuing decisions.

    Worse still they will prolong the litigation so as not to have to make adverse findings.

    Comment by Bevan Berg — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 12:32 pm

  20. You mention a child aged 3.

    If you are an independent witness to a child being alienated by the mother, you can see the child developing behaviours according to what individual parents want or expect.

    The sick/lazy/incompetent mother who cannot offer a range of parenting will encourage the child to be ‘sick’ requiring her sympathy and attention.

    While the father prepared to encourage the child to do things sees an appreciative and willing child wanting more time.

    I’ve seen children participate and interact normally in social situations, but at the presence of the mother revert to a balling needy child who is then removed by the mother.

    But you also have institutions like schools interfering in your parenting because you are the father.

    Comment by Downunder — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 1:45 pm

  21. If you had a family I could understand but one kid and a sick bitch for a mother.

    Pack up and fuck off while you still have a chance a life.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 3:26 pm

  22. Lol not this callsign!

    Comment by Kyle — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 3:41 pm

  23. Man it bothers me the type of advice people get here.

    There should be a disclaimer somewhere that most men sitting on thee boards have so been burned by the system that their advice seem to come straight of Post traumatic Stress disorder handbook.

    Or a man vs women nitpicking contest. “even though we can piss standing up, they cheat and make us piss squatting.”

    WHAT THE FUCK!
    Here is a man trying his utmost best legal way to remedy a situation… And here are guys ready to
    pack his bag for him so he can run away.

    What of the child?

    Comment by JustCurious — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 3:57 pm

  24. And Kyle, anger is good but do not do anything stupid. [As it is meant to counsel you. learn control and restrain your impulses]

    Hating only hurts you. Those who carry hate in them are no better than those they hate. Because hate itself is hateful and soul destroying. Leave them with their hate and learn to better love yourself. You are worthy of love.

    You seem reasonable enough.

    It is true that the system is bias but not for all litigants.
    If you plan on self-repping, ask for help from those here that have gone through it.

    You will need a lot of reading in understanding what parental alienation is and learn not to fight using the same tools the other parent is using.

    The more information you have, the better decison making you can make as to whether to follow it through the courts or step aside and let it run its course. And if you do wish to follow it though the courts, you will spend a lot of hours drafting affidavits, compiling evidence and making sure it will be read when it is at it most relevant. You can get legal aid by getting a lawyer and them maybe choose not to instruct him. {maybe then you can cover yourself for costs?}

    Needless to say, you will have to provide for yourself in order to follow this track. It is lenghty and hard and lost income opportunities are huge.

    More importantly is your state of mental health. This is something you cannot barter for any reason whatsoever. Once you end up with the care of your child. You will have to work twice harder to help him heal whilst going through your own trauma. It took me on average three weeks after each court hearing to resettle into my semi-old self.

    But more damage is being done all the time. Self esteem when reading her affidavits, self value (as an income earner)…Other issues of being with other people with their kids and you cannot fathom how come your own kids are missing out.

    I remember I had to stop seeing certain people for their kids whom were friends with mine always asked about my kids. In hindsight, it was not wise. Keep those contacts because your child will return and you will want him to reconnect. And you might find the best support among those connections.

    There are some parents that are opportunistic alienators – Their child is their income (child support and WINZ) and the best excuse not to work.
    They become alligators if threatened to have that income taken away. Protection order – without notice applications (using false claims of violence and maybe even sexual allegations).

    There are other that cannot survive the lost of the relationship and feel betrayed, rejected, used (for whatever reason) and cannot cope with the separation. Among these are those that elevate a child over the rank of child and to the rank of the other parent so they can both support each other in sitting in judgement of that parent.

    There are strategies for each. But for the latter which is the worse, the parent doing that needs psychological help.It is a form of pathology present in them that they infect the child with. The child grows up disabled emotionally and psychologically. It is also psychological abuse which children should be protected from.

    Comment by JustCurious — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 4:25 pm

  25. I have done silly affidavit thing and it was a joke mostly the content in them so was not bad. I have a parenting order and someone is now as has tried previously to not comply with it. There are no affidavits or any nonsense, just simply file th facts(non compliance)? I am just thinking of gaining more than just weekends as his mother is sick as in manic depression and I obsessed with our son in a sick way, cheers. I have already downloaded the forms and have ready to submit no lawyer needed. Mediation is toilet paper agreement but a parenting order needs to be complied with.

    Comment by Kyle — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 4:54 pm

  26. Excuse typos is not I etc. iPhone screen

    Comment by Kyle — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 4:56 pm

  27. My self esteem never suffers and I am financially in a good position to get the parenting order enforced. Or changed due to lack of compliance etc. So far the Menz.org seem full of excuses or bad results. All my previous family court experience was actually pro father. Now I have a breach so will bring it there attention again as they can see from her other son who is in his 20s with no father at all and has missed out in life( it is like that movie bad boy bubby) that is how not well she is or water boy for example.

    Comment by Kyle — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 5:11 pm

  28. Most of these guys are not ex soldiers so probably done have the discipline or tenacity maybe to keep a level head and go through the appropriate channels? I thought it was MENZ.ORG but I may be on a balls are in her purse website?

    Comment by Kyle — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 5:20 pm

  29. Also Just curious I appreciate your post as it is on point fully. I said she has tried all the dirty tricks and in this instance it was and is what it is just easy to see through. I wish I could help others like me with my strength I do have to spare, I can get the outcome deserved for myself but i wish to help others also.

    Comment by Kyle — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 5:40 pm

  30. The comments about giving up and bailing are made as it is an option for some individuals.
    Presently Kyle you seem to be on the right track in that you are engaging the sytem, have awareness of the actions of the opposition and are coping mentally.
    Not everybody is so lucky. Some people start off in a far worse position and hope of progress to even seeing thier children is negligible. If there was 4 years of child support the advice would be to stick around as your children are nearly adults. If the child is 3 then rather than being a financial slave without reasonable contact with the child then for that persons mental health, abandoning NZ is not a bad option.
    “Pack his bag and run away” is relevant to the posts title. Your not a real man if you don’t support your child etc.
    That’s feminist bribery. How can a person run away from a child’s life if they are already excluded from it. Leaving NZ just prevents the person from being a slave, feminists intention for men. This rejects the system that has rejected them. You only get one life so why sacrifice 15 years as the crowns personnel gender politics cash cow. IE slave.
    Keep positive Kyle as many hear have been through the system, had success, or been burned and scared from it.
    Evan Myers advice was not helpful in your circumstances but has relevance and is real for many.

    Comment by DJ Ward — Sat 14th April 2018 @ 10:55 pm

  31. As a soldier, naturally one understands a readiness for battle, courage at hand.

    One also expects active duty to be someone else’s war in another country.

    The reality of that war being in your own back yard, seeing your child(ren) tortured and die, watching that bright light slowly dim and expire, seeing that person inherit their mother’s hate – that is hard to imagine.

    But that is the risk, and for some that becomes intergenerational and extends to any grandchildren.

    The fact you have identified the behavior means it will be something you have to live with along with the potential outcomes.

    It doesn’t go away because you have the courage to confront it. If anything prolonged engagement with the enemy makes them more determined.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Sun 15th April 2018 @ 12:31 am

  32. We’ve seen these differences of opinion arise before based on personal experiences. That doesn’t need to suggest the advice is courtesy of the post traumatic hand book.

    Particularly around parental alienation, where we have two distinct groups of fathers saying the opposite thing

    Stick with it, the child will come back … mine did.
    They never get over it … mine didn’t.

    I’ve read a Family Court analysis of parental alienation divided into their observed and considered situations that reads like a list of children’s games.

    No more helpful.

    The degree of alienation as we have discussed before tends to fall into two broad categories;

    Some form of estrangement or a transfer of purpose.

    It’s this transfer of purpose from the mother, where they become a collective or intergenerational purpose that causes the most damage.

    Whereas estrangement is behaviours causing separation, distance, infrequent contact … because the mother does not want to deal with the father.

    Obviously and often unrecognised, there is grief from the loss of a child much as there is with any death, but if there is post traumatic stress then one might assume that comes from prolonged exposure to a torturous situation.

    Admittedly #21 didn’t come with any qualification but as MoMA recently observed in the post Resigned From Society where is Nicky Hager’s book on that?

    Comment by Downunder — Sun 15th April 2018 @ 7:16 am

  33. Mediation is toilet paper agreement but a parenting order needs to be complied with.

    One would think so but many men’s experience has been that a parenting order is little more than toilet paper when it’s a female who breaches it. The police tell the father he has to get an enforcement order before they do anything, and even then they expend little additional effort when the mother hides the child away somewhere.

    Contrast that with ‘protection’ orders, which the police are required to enforce aggressively from the outset even though they are generally just a formality following a woman’s untested allegations (…but are disbelieved and required to be accompanied by water tight evidence when it’s a male applying). At least parenting orders usually involve some careful consideration of the child’s best interests, even though that consideration is done by people with poor capability to assess what’s good for children.

    I prefer an attitude towards the Femily Court that if it chooses to collude with mothers in abusing children through wrecking father-child relationships, they will need to do so with no further involvement from the father. The Femily Court can be informed that the father loves the children and wants to support them, and the children are welcome to contact him. But it would be better for fathers not to play in that Court’s nasty feminist cesspit that is so stacked against them. I would rather see fathers walk away in large numbers, leaving the state to provide the provider and protector roles that it is allowed to take over at any mother’s whim.

    In reality, like Kyle I did what was required regarding the Femily Court, representing myself, and although I was subjected to the same kind of sexist discrimination that most fathers experience the other party backed down. Certainly, self-representation (preferably with a little background legal advice, checking your affidavit etc) can be very effective if it’s costing the other party or their legal aid every time their lawyer has to attend to their case.

    Comment by Man X Norton — Sun 15th April 2018 @ 9:39 am

  34. @33 This is not right.

    That’s what I would call the commonsense approach and I agree.

    Making sense of the Family Court goes back to the Bill of Rights. While I’m no constitutional expert, the way I see this is along these lines:

    The Domestic Violence Act is ‘draconian and offensive’ to the purpose of the Bill of Rights in guaranteeing the individual freedom from government interference … in that it makes the respondent a party to that obligation by imposing a duty upon him.

    Basically legal trickery.

    Where as the parenting order relates to a civil order between two parties, where the court is deemed to have assisted.

    Different approaches are taken based on legal interpretations of these pieces of legislation.

    ALL I AM SAYING HERE: IS THIS IS HOW I SEE IT.

    Having said that and going way back, to last century, I drove Muriel Newman to the Fathers’ Protest in Aotea Square, in the ACT bus because it was a political option.

    As we know the quest for 50:50 legislation did not suceed, but since subtle changes have allowed individual judges more freedom in time allocations which have not affected WINZ in terms of funding those situations.

    I have always been convinced (and my individual protests to parliament have been in relation to the DVA) that this, which is the Family Law Section backbone, has been the greater problem.

    Comment by Downunder — Sun 15th April 2018 @ 10:58 am

  35. My case is a little different, my son doesn’t want to go home to his mum when he is with me. He says he wants to stay with me, by alienating I am meaning try tries to make it hard for me to pick him up when it is my time and has tried just a few stunts in the last 3 years which I have been documenting. She is jealous that he enjoys spending time with me.

    Comment by Kyle — Sun 15th April 2018 @ 10:58 am

  36. Kyle. I certainly understand the difficulty and without discussing my own children, I’ve been in a similar situation with a step child who as a baby would aggressively fight his mother simply to get into my arms.

    This I don’t understand to any great extent. Whether it is who the child bonds with, a lack of bonding with the mother, or something the child sees that we cannot.

    Lazyness, being disorganised, unprepared for the child’s immediate needs, i.e. being ready to go and see his father should be no greater issue than having a meal ready.

    The organised disciplined routine that you have aquired (like myself) I believe gives the child a sense of security, an awareness of the reliability of that parent at a very early age.

    This in itself is a conflict in which the mother cannot compete, and because that is not dealt with by the mother as her problem, the conflict escalates and the better parent is designated the cause of the problem.

    Comment by Downunder — Sun 15th April 2018 @ 11:19 am

  37. @34 Back to the same discussion this is basically the point at which Ben Easton and I both met and parted – in that he could only see this as an historical mistake that needed to be retified whereas I saw it as contemporary wool pulling.

    (That’s why those pieces of legal shit hate me so much. It’s like a bit of cold steel to them, and they don’t want it up em, as Jonesy would say.

    Comment by Downunder — Sun 15th April 2018 @ 11:33 am

  38. I do have to say it is refreshing to read so much optimism from you Kyle.

    I remember trying to enforce a parenting order and get the mother admonished once.

    It turned out -according to their logic- that even through there were a parenting order suspending my rights to contact and care of my child except as provided in the parenting agreement (embodied in the order); the rest of the order was simply noting the parenting agreement we had made in court.

    Courts therefore declined to admonish the other parent and declared they had no jurisdiction.

    You do however raise a few concerns.
    I do not understand the dynamics of your saturation well but when you say your 3 year old does not want to go back to his mother; it does not sound too well.

    If he is 3 and if he is having a ball – then of course – he will not want to go to his mother.

    Same when he is at his mother’s and having a ball – he may not want to come to you until he has exhausted whatever fun he is having.

    The key question here is how do you handle it?

    If he is 3 and does not want to have a nap; then he will most likely fidget and cry to get out of bed.

    A 3 year old view is not much to be relied upon.

    No disrespect intended but it does make me wonder whether there is not an element of competition between you and your ex partner and whether she may already have resettled in another relationship?

    Comment by JustCurious — Mon 16th April 2018 @ 7:41 am

  39. @38 no jurisdiction to admonish the mother.

    Depends what year you are referring to as it was originally a criminal offence contained from memory in the Summary Offences Act, but since repealed.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Mon 16th April 2018 @ 9:19 am

  40. @39- year 2016

    Yep a screwed up lawyer for child can argue that a parenting agreement made in court
    common strategy by legal workers. Due to delays (psych report – and whether or not to order one – and lack of evidence either way [without said psych report]); court cannot make any findings at the moment- but since child need both parents, courts will adjourn and let the parents work out ~something~ Father despairing for contact and need to reassure child capitulates and signs ultimatum proposed by mother thinking at least he can see child now – only to find later mother had no intention to let him see child); even though embodied in an order temporarily suspending care rights of one parent is not enforceable as it is because the wording states that the judge notes the parenting agreement attached.

    That’s technically all bullshit as in FACT that order should not be valid without contact time being defined in order.

    Fun and games… Judge (young and former lawyer/mentored by LFC) did agree with LFC and threw it to touch.

    So as a word of caution. Any parenting agreement you make must be clearly converted to an order and be made enforceable before you leave court.

    I remember how both my lawyer at the time and LFC swore till blue that if she did not abide by it, we would get straight back to court and sort it out.

    Took another 14 months before we could it sort it out.

    Comment by JustCurious — Mon 16th April 2018 @ 9:44 am

  41. This was one of the issues that brought Boshier to the TV screen to make the point clear that the Family Court did not have jurisdiction as it was a criminal matter.

    Of course that quickly got changed by repealing that section, but as you point out, this does nothing to create any surety or confidence in a system that doesn’t know itself what it is doing.

    Nor, does it inspire any trust in the bunch of lie-to-your-face shitheads that live there on a daily basis.

    Comment by Downunder — Mon 16th April 2018 @ 9:58 am

  42. @41 – thanks for that info

    and that is essentially what makes these shores treacherous.

    It may take years to identify what land one is stranded on.

    although you state

    Nor, does it inspire any trust in the bunch of lie-to-your-face shitheads that live there on a daily basis

    Getting advice from those above can be a priceless map.

    Comment by JustCurious — Mon 16th April 2018 @ 10:32 am

  43. @42 it’s one f~♡$ed up little country now.

    Not sure that there is anything such as good advice available.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Mon 16th April 2018 @ 3:58 pm

  44. @30

    In your circumstances?

    That looks solely at the issue of a child being involved.

    But you also mentioned childsupport which affects men in different ways.

    Child support economically speaking contributes to the consumerism of mothers.

    If the father is a labourer it reduces his ability to survive or compete financially as a parent.

    If he is a small business operator/tradesmen it interfers with his ability to create, and makes him a target both of the state and female desire.

    These situations can change suddenly.

    I noted the ‘spent my life savings’ which does not equate to one’s ability to earn.

    Comment by Evan Myers — Tue 17th April 2018 @ 8:34 am

  45. @44 – It is not the advice that is lacking but rather the willingness or ability to use it to one’s advantage in regards to serving the best interest of one’s own child(ren).

    The most fundamental problem we have is that we cannot give up our search for justice.

    And what we have is what we have to contend with until it is improved.

    And we do need justice.

    And anyone whom has gone through the FC knows that the human factor is the real problem aside from certain laws being open to abuse.

    I feel that we often go after judges when the problem may not be with the judges (solely) but rather our own representation and expectations of the process.

    Like putting the focus on feminism is actually wrong because it simply creates dissension among ourselves.

    We have mothers, wiwes, girlfriend, sisters and daughters. And they too suffer along with us.

    But going after the laws which we find to be sexist or discriminatory may help us all heal.

    And this is an area where a person’s age or sex does not matter and where we can unite under the banner of justice.

    Comment by JustCurious — Thu 19th April 2018 @ 8:15 am

  46. JUDGES: Are the ruling authority over the law society.

    Reporting to the Law Society
    Hearing disputes
    Judicial Investigations

    Capable of ordering the Law Society to investigate situations.

    Secrecy is a factor in that, but mostly I would suggest their negligence is because of their political alliances and lack of impartiality.

    Comment by Downunder — Thu 19th April 2018 @ 10:22 am

  47. Anything written by Deborah Hill Cone would make most decent people spew so idea of her having a little bit of acid reflux is slightly amusing.

    Why does Clarke Gayford bug me?

    Ardern seems to have done well in that regard. And I’m a feminist. I should be applauding Gayford for stepping up to this new role. So why does the “first man of fishing” give me a little bit of acid reflux?

    Comment by Evan Myers — Mon 23rd April 2018 @ 6:51 am

  48. Even more amusing is that it was probably a Labour Party watchdog that barked at them.

    I see this, which is written in the negative:

    “Gayford’s earliest childhood memory is from when he was 3. His dad was pushing him on a surfboard, into a wave. He grew up tying his own lures, making his own sinkers, pouring over books and committing the Maori and Latin names for fish to memory,” Canvas’ Kim Knight wrote in a 2016 profile. (Impressive. Not many people can remember what happened to them when they were three.)

    I recall reading a rather confusing passage written by Hill Cone about her father not loving her. Something quite distinctive like that sticks in the memory banks, so I’m not surprised to see her belittling the relationship between Gayford and his father, regardless of what the public opinion of him is.

    Says more about her really.

    Comment by Downunder — Mon 23rd April 2018 @ 7:26 am

  49. Clarke with a “wee ‘e’ ” is really getting the piss taken out of him now.

    Has he got a past life to haunt is political present?

    Comment by Evan Myers — Tue 24th April 2018 @ 12:13 pm

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