MENZ Issues: news and discussion about New Zealand men, fathers, family law, divorce, courts, protests, gender politics, and male health.
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Hi Luke,
And so it goes on, 10 years for me in and out of the caught$ system, Based on the
perjury, adversarial system the western world has adopted and continues to support.
It upsets me that the most cannot see or wish not to see the damage caused by continuing
to create the divide between families by turning it into a gender based system of whcih
we know there is normally the desired outcome by the applicant.
I am interested to know what outcome if any has arisen from the submission or is it still
circulating in the system?
Comment by FFC — Fri 4th March 2022 @ 10:03 am
An issue with suicide, is what is the natural rate.
If life gave nothing, to get to that state of mind.
But somehow, a small amount would suicide anyway.
You can definitely see high rates, with mental health disorders.
A normal person may be fine, but they may not.
If normal people are also suicidal, then something is very wrong.
So with a third of farmer suicides, relationship breakup was present.
That is much higher, than the natural rate can be.
Why then was there no female farmer suicides, none for relationships.
One can then assume, females suicide close to the natural rate.
While males suicide, not only at the natural rate.
But the excess, is environmental.
Comment by DJ Ward — Sun 6th March 2022 @ 9:03 am
This case got very interesting, for many reasons.
We should avoid talking about guilt, as it’s before the courts.
Our legal system has missed, the stab in the back cases before.
And very few women, get the no parole sentences men get.
https://www.stuff.co.nz/national/crime/127985862/i-feared-for-his-life-victims-brother-says-he-was-regularly-assaulted-by-partner
What a surprise, there’s no phone numbers at the page bottom.
We all know, calling the police gets the male in trouble.
It seems like this male, there was no phone number for help.
Where was, the court made protection order.
Or banned, from the victims city upon release.
Where was the DV committee, watching over the vulnerable.
A carbon copy, of the male DV offender.
Women’s refuge would be outraged, at not being allowed to help.
Ironically, it’s women’s day.
Comment by DJ Ward — Tue 8th March 2022 @ 5:29 pm
I was practicing speaking, doing attacks on a district court judge.
I found it relatively easy, even with occasional little parables.
The hard part is controlling my anger, at the judges acts.
Not letting emotions show, is a difficult thing.
So to me, the problem is much more than the family court.
They have blatant acts of bigotry, and are easy to mock.
Hard to respect something, that uses perjury as a legal standard.
I would demand the district court judge, act against one of the many crimes.
It cannot be avoided, in regard to any judge.
I have publicly accused them, of the worst of crimes.
Because they are naturally, gynocentric.
They fail to see what they are actually doing, then snap game over.
So for #3, I did a little experiment.
One I did many years ago a hundred times, testing responses to DV.
A scenario of DV, with all responding the male was guilty.
Only two in this test, but both responded the same.
He must have deserved it.
I know the enemy, more than the enemy knows me.
Comment by DJ Ward — Wed 9th March 2022 @ 4:59 pm
#3 I must admit the 2022 International Women’s day slogan “Stop the Bias” didn’t sit well with me. The OZ Family Law enquiry and this article are a perfect example of why. On a breakfast show yesterday, the female hosts gave ‘shout outs’ to all the mum’s struggling to raise families in the face of record highs in the cost of living. The male host commented ‘what about the men who are having to earn the money?’ reading the room he immediately back tracked.
From the AU International Men’s day website:
– 3 out of 4 suicides are men
– 2 out of 3 violent deaths are men
– Men die 6 years younger than women on average
– Boys underperform girls at every stage of education
– Dads who want to be more involved in their children’s lives face a range of barriers
Despite the overwhelming evidence that men and boys face a range of issues related to their physical, mental and social health and welling, many people still persist in promoting a range rigid gender stereotypes and clichés like:
– “Man Up”
– “Boys don’t cry”
– “Men and boys don’t need help” and “Every day is International Men’s Day”
Comment by ErasingDad — Thu 10th March 2022 @ 5:23 am
@5 There is a bias, and it’s not a mild one.
Our health minister Andrew Little, a lawyer, knows exactly why men commit suicide. How he combats that is to hide those reasons from the public. I can’t find the news link that detailed how they hid those suicide figures and were hauled over the coals by the news media for it.
You may very well ask why? Well just imagine this…. You are a minister of the crown, you want to highlight the main reasons why men commit suicide. Example, divorce, separation of his children, the taking of his property, all his stuff in the property, child alienation, his future income taken by IRD. Another reason why men top themselves is false rape allegations.
You want to present this in parliament. Well first up you have to get permission from the leader of your party. It would be unlikely to get approval. Just imagine the cat calling, the screams across the house! The media having a field day. Headlines would say.
Minister does not support child protection.
Minister favours rapists and child abusers.
Minister blames the victims of abuse.
Minister wants children to live in poverty.
Minister wants children to suffer.
Minister allows family violence to continue.
They would shout it from the rooftops. And as usual, the public would buy into it.
Of course, we know this is crap.
Absolutely no consideration that a dad or male victim is lying dead in the ground with a rope burn around his neck. A child lost their loving dad. They, the feminists, would quickly see where that speech was headed and go nuclear.
They just don’t see it as a not guilty verdict. They see it as a “he got off”. They don’t see it as the union broke down, with either him or her or both parties responsible. They just don’t see it as he can’t work when he has been abused in that way. They just don’t see it as a dad works all hours, has his money, his home, his children taken from him. His children being raised by another man. He sees no future, no way forward, poor living conditions. He sees it as, well here are my 2 options. I’m going to live an awful no future life from here on in. What’s the point in that?
So he writes a few suicide letters to his loved ones, buys a rope from the hardware store, ties a loop, climbs a tree, ties the rope around a branch, puts the loop around his neck and lets himself fall. He doesn’t have to put up with that abuse anymore, the hurt, the injustice from the family court. He does not have to cope with the knowledge his children were alienated from him.
I’m starting to think the reason why the cops turn up so quick is because Andrew Little looses so much tax.
The proof is in the numbers, of dead men. They have the suicide notes and the Andrew Little is too scared of the feminists and does not give a shit.
In Ireland, a person charged with a sex offence can only have their name published on a not guilty verdict.
In Australia, you are now required to sort out family disputes by mediation or online.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_djNh38i4g
Comment by Lukenz — Sun 13th March 2022 @ 2:38 am
It is clearly, a banned subject.
Otherwise the media, would investigate.
We would know, how deadly fatherhood is.
They would have the figures, for child support suicides etc.
The safest from suicide, is the stay at home mother.
Yet the figures for the fathers, is a mystery hidden in statistics.
If suicide is a measure of hardship, one can look at job data.
Then life must be easy, for stay at home mothers with rare suicides.
Raw data, only says three times as many men suicide but not why.
But if mothers rarely suicide, due to parenting decisions.
Then female suicide, must all be from other causes.
Causes we can assume, men also experience equally.
What then of the two thirds, of male suicides remaining.
A cause cannot be attributed, to the equal life of a woman.
Then logic dictates, there is unequal treatment of men.
Comment by DJ Ward — Mon 14th March 2022 @ 5:37 pm
Suicide ideation, is not a good thing.
To the extreme, methods of suicide are everywhere.
Worse if you think, of taking others with you.
Whatever war of the mind they experience, it is not worth that price.
There is no reward, for such an end.
Better even to suffer, for the scant rewards of living.
What then of a society when the scant rewards fail, and is ignored.
It is culture then, to turn a blind eye to men’s suicides.
Secretly the human thinks, it was for a good reason.
Comment by DJ Ward — Mon 14th March 2022 @ 6:04 pm
Refer to Durkeim’s classic study “Suicide”. When women can’t leave they suicide. When they can, men suicide. Much more complicated than that of course, but please, if you’re not educated in the history of social life, stop making absurd comments.
Comment by Angela Church — Wed 30th March 2022 @ 1:23 pm
Angela, your point of view is welcomed. However,
Émile Durkheim book was taught to psychology students. It was published in 1897.
Your comment women can’t leave may have been right in 1897. In 2022 and for many decades, it is not true.
The issue is women won’t leave. They stay. They are awarded all his belongings, including his home. He looses contact with his children.
Angela, where would you go if that happened to you?
Angela, please tell me where all the mens shelters are?
Angela, please tell me where the exclusive funding for men is?
Angela, what is the phone number for the ministry of men and boys? Thats right, there isn’t one.
Angela, what are the statistics male v female for the last 50 years?
Angela, how many women have poured petrol over themselves and lit themselves up on the steps of NZ parliament?
Angela, how many women are paying child support ver how many men?
The matter is not complicated. It’s all about abusing mens family and property rights, his income until he either goes berserk, limps along in a meaningless life or commits suicide. The latter 2 being the most common.
Comment by Lukenz — Wed 30th March 2022 @ 3:02 pm
Very well put Lukenz.
I wasn’t going to argue, and accept the criticism.
I guess she knows little, of my experiences with suicide.
And it seems attacking, is a way of saying hello.
It’s one thing, to have suicidal thoughts.
It is another thing, to go past where you can’t cope.
I am however still writing.
Since people with my disorder have the highest suicide rate.
I have a learnt perspective of things.
Comment by DJ Ward — Wed 30th March 2022 @ 6:55 pm
@11 It wasn’t criticism of Angela. It was acknowledgement she has a very good point from a time when the horseless carriage had not yet been invented.
Angela’s comments may have been made from the environment she was brought up in. Because there are abusive men, fathers that need a good kick in the pants.
Male suicide kills more that covid. Now before someone starts quoting NZ news stories about the number of covid deaths. You need to read the words in the news article. They all say (number) of people died with covid. None of them say “died of covid.” Elderly and the infirm have always died of the flu.
https://theconversation.com/died-from-or-died-with-covid-19-we-need-a-transparent-approach-to-counting-coronavirus-deaths-145438
https://www.stuff.co.nz/national/health/coronavirus/300552951/covid19-three-people-died-in-past-24-hours-after-highest-number-of-deaths-reported
https://www.stuff.co.nz/national/health/coronavirus/300478487/covid19-a-person-has-died-61-people-in-hospital-with-virus
Comment by Lukenz — Wed 30th March 2022 @ 10:26 pm
More men in NZ commit suicide every year than the entire (male and female) road toll and homicide toll combined.
Comment by Ministry of Men's Affairs — Fri 1st April 2022 @ 8:50 am
@13
How do I know the family court is aware men, fathers, are at high risk of suicide? How the system makes fathers end their lives?
One of the series of preliminary questions fathers are asked when referred to a domestic violence course is.
Are you losing weight?
Are you sleeping well?
I think to myself, is losing weight or not sleeping well a violent act?
These types of questions are used to assess your suicide threshold.
The violence course is the Duluth model. In essence, you have to agree to her porkies in order to see your children. This shows me they are without doubt aware of what they are doing is causing the long list of male suicides.
Families have name suppression to protect the wellbeing of children and mothers. I do not know of any law that protects the judges who do not take into account a father’s evidence, or individuals names who run such Duluth course.
Those individuals should be shamed in all forms of media, web pages social media, tweets, posts. They should be labelled as,
“The Perpetrators of Suicide.”
Comment by Lukenz — Fri 1st April 2022 @ 10:10 am
The Deluth Model via the EU private search engine Qwant.com
https://www.qwant.com/?t=videos&q=Duluth+model&o=0%3AXKNWcyWic18
Comment by Lukenz — Mon 4th April 2022 @ 8:00 am
I went for a wander, starting with wiki Duluth Model.
And found this link.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nonviolent_Communication
The good part, is studying effectiveness is happening.
Which is important, when looking at the Duluth Model.
Since half the populations acts, are ignored.
A two person problem, where one is never treated.
Still has the same problem.
“ A 2011 review of the effectiveness of batterers intervention programs (BIP) (primarily Duluth Model) found that “there is no solid empirical evidence for either the effectiveness or relative superiority of any of the current group interventions,” and that “the more rigorous the methodology of evaluation studies, the less encouraging their findings.”[15] That is, as BIPs in general, and Duluth Model programs in particular are subject to increasingly rigorous review, their success rate approaches zero.”
The course may teach, a perspective of a males violence.
Showing them why, they were violent.
Something happened, to get control they used violence.
Like Will Smith, for 30 seconds nobody was home.
But not teach, how to stop it happening.
The nonviolent communication course, may be better.
Was it not the argument, that resulted in the violence.
Comment by DJ Ward — Mon 4th April 2022 @ 7:39 pm
Shine use the Duluth model. As do most support groups for women. The magic ‘wheel’ is used to blame men and to condone violence against men. The model is proven to be flawed and has been a part of the feminists arsenal for many years.
Comment by ErasingDad — Tue 5th April 2022 @ 11:29 am
This is worth a listen. Dads in Distress:
https://parentsbeyondbreakup.com/abc-radio-newcastle/
Comment by ErasingDad — Wed 6th April 2022 @ 3:10 pm
Frustratingly, budget after budget has nothing for men.
Yet the statistics and things quoted, expose how bad things are for men.
If having suicidal ideation, is the worst it gets.
Then just as it is in Australia, NZ is a dangerous place for men.
It reinforces research of teenage fathers, how harmful and deadly it is.
Adult males just cope a little better, with only half suffering.
There is nothing half of women, must suffer with such death rates.
Or is this contempt for men, justification for childbirth and its harms.
What then of the male, who never consented to the pregnancy.
Why then is that, also about half the time.
Presently they talk of misogyny, with real examples of deluded men.
Budget after budget, has zero misogyny in it.
It has an ever increasing bounty, for the deeds of men.
If women had it as hard as some men, in life’s outcomes.
Laws upon laws would be made, billions upon billions would be budgeted.
What a sad world it would become, with no money left.
Everyone will just work, for paying the taxes they get back.
Far better to fix the cause, than treat the disease.
Comment by DJ Ward — Wed 6th April 2022 @ 7:08 pm
@ 18
That is a good find Mr Erasing Dad.
They, the authorities have a full and complete understanding of how the unbalanced and unreasonable family court, IRD through child support push men, a loving father into a corner of unrecoverable lifelong hopelessness.
Using perjury, pretending to be a victim combined with parental alienation in order to obtain property, financial benefit, an income is the ultimate goal of a woman who is separating.
Women claiming everything from financial abuse, manipulation, psychological abuse, even sexual abuse, suspected affairs. Anything to get it over the line. So what happens when you challenge the perjury with real evidence? It is either discarded or totally ignored. Sometimes if you produce such evidence, you are yelled at.
The child’s relationship with their dad is never considered.
The child unsure why his mother’s hatred and bitterness towards their father is over time convinced their dad is an awful man. Unworthy of being called dad.
The father is then faced with The Duluth model to accept the perjury and deceit before he is able to see his children.
The home is given to the mother for free.
Total and utter destruction of the father for money and all his belongings he has worked for, his entire life gone.
Left with nothing, having his good will abused he decides to not proceed with the rest of his life. Some go Bezek and murder their former wife/partner. All the authorities say is – see, he was a violent man. Others tip petrol over their heads and lite themselves up in full view of the government.
Then comes the coverup crew.
First cab off the rank is the family court. The family court is closed to the public, media scrutiny.
Next up is the 2 paragraph public coroner’s report. Censoring and describing the deceased victim as a man struggling to come to terms with his behavior.
Finally, is the minister of health or health spokesperson who hides the suicide figures, makes them difficult to find. This turns the dad who once had a name into a number and not a human being.
So here is a message to the minister of health and ministry for women. You are just a bunch of mental abusers of human rights for children and fathers.
I see change coming. Australia has already made the first steps to reduce male suicide by cancelling the family court. OK so you ask so what. Well, here’s what. Gone are the family court rules. The judges must consider all evidence. It is an open court.
Here is a message for males. If you decide to get into a relationship, have children you need to separate yourself from your property and income first. It needs to be owned by someone else. If you are the owner of a home, rent it out, rent one yourself, never divert your income to cover the cost of the home you own. This is not a failsafe. Talk to a lawyer who is in the industry and at the peek of their profession.
Consider the fact you can’t change the government, but you can change what country to live in.
Ask for advice here.
Here are some links.
https://menz.org.nz/2021/he-wrote-parental-alienation-is-devastating-i-loved-my-children-as-much-as-a-husband-and-father-could-i-see-no-light/
https://menz.org.nz/2021/child-support-ird-disclose-the-number-of-deaths-of-the-non-custodial-parent-ird-calls-them-customers-and-they-are-generally-unaware-of-the-cause-of-death/
https://menz.org.nz/2021/burit-zuberys-wrote-a-thesis-on-the-impacts-of-men-during-and-after-divorce/
https://www.mothersofsons.info/
https://menz.org.nz/2021/australian-family-court-judges-to-be-trained-about-the-malicious-use-of-false-accusations/
https://menz.org.nz/2017/labour-says-a-rape-victim-should-be-believed-as-a-starting-point/
Comment by Lukenz — Thu 7th April 2022 @ 7:09 am