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MENZ Issues: news and discussion about New Zealand men, fathers, family law, divorce, courts, protests, gender politics, and male health.

Tue 31st October 2006

Excuse Me !

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 12:22 am

What is this……

A number of key directional matters were endorsed unanimously, including the formation of Women’s Council led by women with authority to influence the Federation on matters affecting the well being of women in their relationships, homes, community and workplace.

Sun 29th October 2006

An unfortunate set of circumstances

Filed under: General — PGRoy @ 10:03 pm

I just read an article on young men in our mental health services, written by a young mans mum.
Brilliant, best article in ages!
It rang bells for me of countless tales I hear in a supporting role for men of all ages. There has for so long been a movement to turn our men in to the villians of our societies ills. The system isn’t even covert about it, its all over our news, yet there is little focus on the good things men do. There are continual references in the press relating to inequality and gender imbalance, yet for the life of me I am not sure where this actually exists, because I don’t know any men who still subscribe to the veiws that are upheld by whoever reports this stuff.

I read a quote that kids these days suffer a case of “too much mother and not enough father”, I have read many times of underfathering and a lack of male role models. I wonder how much this manifests itself in the behavior of young men and women. I have a belief that our young people would benefit from some good male energy.

I don’t uphold myself as perfect and as an example to anyone. However if one person gets value from talking through their problem with me thats good. In the majority of cases they have no idea how to relate to an older man. Therefore against the grain I have remained open to anyone who wants to discuss their problens ith me, regardless of age or gender. Now I am not a sounding board or a sage, I’m quite happy to point out where they behave badly as gently as I can. I ask them what they need to do with thier problem so they can feel better. Sometimes they do actually do what they need to! By them selves! Most people once they are heard have their own answer inside them!

Sometimes I think our society is too focused on career, sucsess, money, qualification, safety. This puts a lot of stress on young people, where does happiness feature in this?

On the subjectt of sport as an outlet? I think the term competition has been twisted in to winning. It should be about the game not the result. And sport aint for everyone. Sometimes too I wonder if a safe way to vent anger and exercise growing strength would help our young people. I wonder if young people need a safe forum to explore their own minds, to try other ways to get the rush they now get from law breaking, drinking, drugs, or driving fast, fighting.

I certainly think in terms of relationships interpersonal skills, dispute resolutions, negotiation, and understanding need to be taught to both genders. Possibly there needs to be a greater understanding of men by women, and of women by men. After all we live with mistrust and fear of each other…..we’re screwed.

Mental health and our Teenage boys

Filed under: General — Julie @ 5:14 pm

Be aware; be very aware when you send your boys to Mental Health. I cannot stress enough that if you find yourself working with Mental Health insist on a male Psychiatrist or Psychologist for your boys. And be present for their interviews.

Do not let what I am going through be your story.

I approached Mental Health for my son as just like many parents especially single parents I was concerned for his behaviour and state of mind.

On one interview, my son stated that, “Girls dress up so young it is hard to know which of them is old enough to like and that sometimes he sees them in short skirts, heels, low tops and so on from behind, thinks sexually, then sees them front-on and realises they are too young.”

Never had I seen 2 women’s heads lift so fast and eyes light up and widen as if their Christmas had come early. “Hold on a minute”‘ I said. “It is normal for boys to have these thoughts in their teens.”

But the verdict was in and in writing. My son is a potential rapist. Now I will spend as long as it takes alongside all the other mother’s fighting this bias to clear my son’s name. I write letters to Mental Health but receive no replies. So, now my son is another statistic to show how young girls are unsafe. Another statistic for women’s refuge to use and alongside them their sister family violence.

Fri 27th October 2006

NZ Family Violence Clearinghouse

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 9:22 pm

Current Initiatives link

The New Zealand Family Violence Clearinghouse maintains a list of current initiatives in the field of family violence prevention and intervention within Aotearoa New Zealand, including current projects, programmes, and strategies in the areas of: Services and practice; Research and evaluation; and Policy and legislation.

XY is a website focused on men?

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 8:40 pm

XY: men, masculinities, and gender politics

XY is a website focused on men, masculinities, and gender politics. XY is a space for the exploration of issues of gender and sexuality, the daily issues of men’s and women’s lives, and practical discussion of personal and social change.

Thu 26th October 2006

Jim Bagnall – Family Court should follow Australia

Filed under: Law & Courts — JohnPotter @ 9:26 pm

On Newstalk 1ZB:
Children’s best interests should be central

Great to see a positive message getting reported straight, I hope the reporter’s job is safe. A pity they didn’t get the Father’s Coalition name correct!

“…it is time to stop picking sides in custody battles and find what is best for the child.”

His comments follow the indefinite jailing of a Hamilton mother, 35-year-old Kay Skelton, for refusing to reveal the whereabouts of her son Jayden Headley.

Coalition of Fathers spokesman, Jim Bagnall says if the courts took Australia’s lead and made the presumption of shared custody, parents would not take such drastic measures.

Programme for Child Support Meeting

Filed under: Child Support — JohnPotter @ 9:06 pm

Saturday 29th October 2006
Venue — Auckland Bridge Club
273 Remuera Rd. Auckland

10.00am Welcome – Project Reunion – Bevan Berg

10.10am Housekeeping

10.15am Personal experiences of child support
6 Speakers of 5 minutes each

10.50-11.30am Guest Speaker – Dr. Viv Roberts
Subject — Suicide

Children Banned From Playing Tag in New England

Filed under: General — Intrepid @ 5:50 pm

Dateline: US
From: Honor Network
Author: Pit Bull

That’s right, certain schools have now banned the Game of “Tag” by stopping it in its tracks in area schools in the New England region of the US. With all that’s wrong with the world, the PC types are after the little things in our kids’ lives (last month it was boys being forced to pee like girls in Norway).

The motivation to micromanaging kids must be because it leads to passive adults that don’t mind being micromanaged, I guess (hint, hint… get off your duffs momma’s boys or homeboys). As each new outrage becomes accepted most tune out and don’t wish to cause a stir, for it’s risky being called angry white male- or worse intolerant (ooow… scary).

Child Support Forum.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 2:52 pm

Link to Scoop

Project Re-Union Press Release.

We have been cutting fathers off at the knees for the past 20 years, we are paying the price socially and politicians are still not prepared to front up to the legislation that is the driving force behind social decay.

Wed 25th October 2006

Vikings Draw Yellow Line in Snow

Filed under: General — Intrepid @ 4:24 pm

From: Norway (Source not identified)
Commentary: Pit Bull
Via: The Honor Network

(Funny, But Still Just Another Sign of the Coming Gender War)

Urination Will Go to Committee

A local [Norway] decision that schoolboys must sit on toilet seats when urinating has provoked political debate. The head of The Democrats Party, a splinter group of former Progress Party hardliners, Vidar Kleppe, is outraged that boys at Dvergsnes School in Kristiansand have to sit and pee.

To be a feminist or not?

Filed under: General — Julie @ 2:44 pm

Let’s have some fun.

Do you want to know what the feminist are doing with the tax-payers money? Hmmm… Let’s see.

Firstly, I need to point out that I have not spent tax payers money on researching this so I don’t have all the credibility (shite) to go with it although I would love to be put in the same room as them… I am only grateful to the people like Felicity who could have taken huge chunks of tax payers money if only she told the femenists what they wanted to hear. (Oh, damn, .. that’s what I could have done … but then my boys are more precious than money)

Anyhow, first they get grants to send all their women to get PhD’s (you know you are not the greatest without one of these) Then (and your spineless, greedy, manipulating feminist men) slowly by working in the social field offer or are asked by another gold digger to speak to a group of social working people. Of course you have to be in the scene so you apply for more tax payers money to listen to the speaker. For example, Bevan’s group is charging $10 a person to hear a guest speaker on the topic of suicide whereas females are charging around $200 per person.

I am hoping you have the picture of a career where the peak is … money, money, money.

Oh, by the way did I tell you that WINZ is paying for the women to start a business and that your women’s affairs government mininster is also minister for small business (thanx to John P). That might not mean much to you but did you know that this small business grant is being offered for both men and women yet it is not really attainable for men to get . Did you know that the criteria is that you cannot go into a businees that you have ever had experience in. Doesn’t that mean that if you have worked and want to do something you enjoy, then you are “Out of Luck.” Doesn’t that sound like all my male friends are mean’t to be pushed away even though they have $20,000 sitting in the bank or a possible mortgage where they could take this risk and just need a small amount of support?

So, let’s keep going. What are these women doing for a business? Now, don’t get me wrong as I know there are some very ligitimate women businesses out there but some are selling themselves. Selling their knowledge to other charitable female groups.

Are you wondering about now whether or not the control factor is coming into play? If all these women are leaving the DPB and going to work for charities and gaining funding from feminist groups then are we really assisting people or just creating puppets?

And isn’t this power and control over small business giving even more power to feminism?

I will come back when my head figures more out…..

Nobody’s Child.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 2:04 am

The commission’s founding father, Mr Dunne, admits he had hoped the commission would be more vocal on family issues. Stuff Article.

But he does not agree it has been given too wide-a-brief, or is replicating work. “We worked very hard on the definition . . . It’s important — it seems to me — for a body like this, it cannot be too exclusive.”

He said goodbye to the commission on the day it was launched, but “like any parent whose kids were leaving home, you hope that they did the right thing”. That includes making more of an impact on the public. “I think that it’s proved its worth . . . It now needs to be prepared to move forward — there will be a lot of issues coming up over the next few years that they need to be critically involved in and taking a stand on.”

I think that it’s proved its worth . . . That was an expensive thought, wasn’t it.


Filed under: General — Downunder @ 12:48 am

Children’s orgs urge politicians to repeal s59
Tuesday, 24 October 2006, 9:32 am
Press Release: EPOCH NZ
Media Release EMBARGOED until 24 October 2006

Those involved – note the charitable trusts.

Action for Children and Youth Aotearoa
Ahu Whakatika Challenge Violence Trust
Alternatives to Violence Project (Waikato) Inc
Barnardos New Zealand
Brainwave Trust (more…)

Tue 24th October 2006

Streets of Shame – John Hudson.

Filed under: General — Julie @ 4:46 pm

TVNZ 1’s program ‘Sunday’ just keeps on bringing out the truth for New Zealanders.

We spend some nights on the mean and violent streets of south Auckland. Teenagers out of control and it’s a big problem for law enforcement. Why is it happening? What are the police and the local community doing about it?

We all know of the hard and dedicated work that our father’s groups and coalition have done and do and how they have brought the problems of father’s rights and the unacceptable abuse they endure just to merely be in their children’s lives and for their children to have the neccessesities only a father can give.

But now we are seeing the effects of fatherlessness on our youth, the effects of a nation forcing it’s females to fear men and forcing it’s men to be something (I can’t describe as I don’t know how, yet) that they are not mean’t to be. But our children really, really need their dads. Not dads that are sick and powerless because women’s anxieties have over-powered them and we have cut them off at every angle just in case they do something we don’t like for who among us is the first to stand as perfect.

To all the warriors that New Zealand has pulled down, shunned and locked up, my boys and the boys of our nation are relying on you. Oh, and by the way, “Thank-you.”

Check out this documentory SUNDAY

Don’t forget to click the title in the middle columne.
Streets of Shame.

Mon 23rd October 2006

United Nations one-sided Study on Violence Against Women

Filed under: Domestic Violence — JohnPotter @ 1:37 pm

RADAR Alert > ACTION Sought

Time to Blow the Whistle on the UN Violence Report

Two weeks ago the United Nations issued its one-sided Study on Violence Against Women:

If you haven’t reviewed the report yet, think of it this way: What the Violence Against Women Act has done to families in the United States, this report may do to families throughout the entire world.

The report’s portrayal of domestic violence is so flawed that leading family violence researchers around the world are speaking out against its deliberate bias:

– Research on intimate partner violence consistently finds that men and women use similar types of aggression. By ignoring the mutual nature of much partner violence, the UN ensures that both women and men will continue to be victimised in this way. – Nicola Graham-Kevan, PhD, University of Central Lancashire, England

– The UN report s discussion on domestic violence is biased because it deliberately ignores half the problem female perpetrators. Ending violence against women by male partners is not going to be achieved until women also desist. – Murray A. Straus, PhD, Co-Director, Family Research Laboratory, University of New Hampshire

– Much domestic violence research conducted in North America has been so biased that it might be called junk science. It has used selective data and interpreted results in a way that depicts all males as real or potential perpetrators, while downplaying female violence. – Donald Dutton, PhD, University of British Columbia, Canada

– Studies consistently show that throughout the Western world, men and women initiate physical violence at about equal rates, and frequently partner violence is reciprocal. Portraying inter-partner violence as though it only involves male perpetrators and female victims does both men and women a disservice. – Felicity Goodyear-Smith, MB ChB , University of Auckland, New Zealand

For years, feminists at the UN have pushed through their resolutions, conferences, and programs. With no one to tell the other side of the story, these persons have operated virtually unchecked.

Youth stabbed to death in fight

Filed under: General — Julie @ 10:45 am

I wrote a post only 3 days ago of my fear of these young boys who are not in gangs carrying knives to protect themselves.

Violence and our teens

Well, 2 days later and we have a death and hospitilazion right outside one of the highest graded high schools in West Auckland and out side a church of people.

Youth stabbed to death in fight
UPDATED 9.40am Monday October 23, 2006

A 14-year-old Avondale college student (boy) was stabbed to death and another injured during an attack outside Avondale College last night.

Police said the incident was a random act of violence and the pair got into a fight with a group driving past.

“He was a jokester, no way he would look for trouble, he was too young” the youth said.

He said his brother was standing outside the school gates waiting for a friend to come back from a nearby dairy with a pie when he was attacked by a group of youths.

Pleae read the rest of the article. It is too heartbreaking for me to explain it all.

Dissing Men

Filed under: General — Intrepid @ 12:00 am

From: Australia
Author: Jim Macnamara at Online Opinion
Commentary: Intrepid
Via: Honor Network

Stats to Back Up What We Already Know From Experience
(Use these for Reference with those in Denial)

Here is a piece by a Aussie columnist showing that men’s activism has more behind it than just passion for the cause, by relating the stats that back up what many rant about of the forums. Unfortunately, like many, this columnist is unwilling to direct angry at anything but vague large terms (like the media) that aren’t directed at anything that will upset his readers. In this way solutions seem beyond his grasp, for they would involve stepping on the toes of all his effeminate readers feelings.

‘Dissing’ Men: The New Gender War

A 1995-96 study reported in a 2002 book, Media, Gender and Identity by media researcher David Gauntlett, found 43 per cent of major characters in TV shows were women – up from 18 per cent in 1992-93. The study reported that, on a character-by-character basis, females and males were equal in all criteria studied. Analysis of newspapers and magazines also has found portrayals of women improving – albeit there is still a way to go in some areas according to feminist scholars.

Sun 22nd October 2006

Carnivorous Collins out for blood.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 10:28 pm

I wasn’t impressed with the Herald of Sunday article on child support. Judith Collins has obviously enlisted the help of some of our lame journalists, to promote her cause. Any journalist with an ounce of credibility would have had opposing views in their article. Perhaps the suggestion here is that there is no opposing point of view. Given that parliament has just passed new child support legislation why is Judith Collins running the big National Party campaign? It has just been debated in parliament. Collins is starting to run over that fine line the way she carries on about Deadbeat Dads and child support. Sounds to me like she is locked into some sort of high flying girls club who have been trying to get money off their ex under the child support legislation. That has nothing to do with families and children. That is just abusing your political position. It is more likely to be about the corporate bitch that didn’t have the best accountant.

In the mean time organisations like Parents for Children and Project Re-Union will continue to exist, and will work toward advocating for realistic legislation. If the world is a smaller place then we do not need to run years behind the rest of the world in social legislation. England for example has abandoned the same type of legislation that puts fathers in debt to the state — it doesn’t work.

I suspect the news about the child support Forum in Auckland next weekend and the conference in Wellington in January is starting to get around. This could be what is drawing Collins out on a limb. Given the list of press releases and articles Collins has produced recently you would be forgiven for thinking this was Nationals “Key” platform and she was in Election mode.

Beyond this you can see just how sad our political situation is when you look at the Families commission. They haven’t even worked out what they are meant to be doing, and they were right into the Labour party support role — abandon section 59. Did I miss the release about child support from them? So much for the independent voice for the family! Collins is family spokesperson. Did you see the family’s commission responding to all the press releases Collins has released lately on child support?

The biggest laugh of all is old Chuck Bird quitting Act and cuddling up to Collins. Is Collins recently separated or something?

Hearld / Judith Collins attack dads

Filed under: General — Scrap_The_CSA @ 10:24 am

? The Sunday Hearld and Auntie Judith? a at it again.

So lets look at the quality of Journalism that the Sunday Herald provides in this article.
Stephen Cook showcases how lamentable the quality of journalism on Child Support Tax debt actually is.

1) Focusing on “387 fathers” who are alleged to owe “6.3 in Child Support” is a good example of? tabloid statistics. There are 123,134 parents who IRD consider in debt? and this sensationalist journalism “rich dads owe millions” focuses on 0.3143% of this population excluding the other 97.7%

2) Granny Herald continues to ? promote Auntie Judy’s claim there is over 1 billion in Child Support Tax owed. This claim is incorrect and a quick search of Google reveals The latest figures for child support debt nationally show that the total is just over $1 billion, with unpaid penalties making up about $640 million of that.”
The reality is that child support tax owed is about 360 Million. Number two example of the failure of Granny Heralds “journalist”, Stephen Cook to do conduct any basic research and analysis? before publication. Penalties go to the crown as will the bulk of the “debt”. Very little of any money collected will go to children.


3) I must ask where the balance in this artilce is. Where is the interview with the mother who earned over 100K and was placed into debt by IRD misadministration? This person is real, but was the “journalist” interested? No, looking at the root cause of the failure of this legislation for both paying and reciving parents is beyond the tabloid press brief.

Who was quoted? An IRD Spokespersom, whats the name of the offical? An Auckland mother, related to the journalist perhaps? Judith Collin a National MP? who should employ a decent analyst. Where is the balance?


4)? Would not the basic question to be asked in an article that slams as deadbeat any parent who is “in debt” for child support tax be : Whyare 72% of parents who pay child support tax in debt ??


5) Judith Collins, representing the National Party, is following in the footsteps of a campgain begun by Katherine Rich? is seeking to reduce the publics perception of any parent who owes a child support tax debt as a deadbeat dad, depriving their children of? the support they are entitled to.? These errant parents will be forced into line when the National Party takes control.?

Now surely any reporter would have sought more information on these 387 fathers before he reacged a conclusion that tey are deadbeat.

How many of these parents are in “debt” as a result of IRD’s admoinistration of the Act?

How many parents in this group have had an unrealistic payment level set in the secret administrative review tribunal?

How many of these parents are making compulsory student loan repayments.

How many of these parents have been a;llenated from the children they are levied for?

How many of these parents are making payments agreed to with IRD to repay the? “debt”?

Why do 387 parents owe 6.3 million dollars?

That represents an average debt of of about $162,000.

This should be demanding some investigative journalism!Any improvement reuires that the root cause or causes not chasing symptoms. The “debt is a symptom” of fundemtal flaws in the underlying legislation.

This legislation is not serving parents or their children and the best the? “journalists ” can come up with is? National Party Spin?

It would be nice to see a journalist who had the? “balls” to report the real story of Child Support Tax in this country.

? ? ?

? ? ? ?

Fri 20th October 2006

Violence and our teenagers

Filed under: General — Julie @ 10:15 am

So, while we sit back and watch our country turn into a COMPLETE frenzy over women being safe from even a hard word, we need to ask ourselves “Do our youth have a hope for a future?”

My 2 eyes and ears have been watching and hearing some really disturbing facts.

Over the last week I have been discussing with young males aged 15, 16, and 17 the implications of them taping kitchen knives to their calves when going out to the city to listen to a band or to the plaza to watch a movie. I do understand why they are doing this and I do not misunderstand the fear they feel. I mean, it has become life threateneing for our young men to leave home on an outing especially at night . But I can’t help but see the innocence in their eyes and wonder if they could even use a knife to lunge into another human being’s body.

There is no way it would be easy to cut someone but then they are starting by explaining to each other that you need to stab and twist else the perpertrator will get back up even with the knife lodged inside them.

Do you know that these are good boys. They are not the one’s whose father’s are involved in gangs but have father’s and mother’s who would love to give luxuries but can only afford the bare essentials. These young guys are the kids getting the high marks at school, love sports and can cook and clean, wash they own clothes, clean their rooms, read books, are computer savvy and more. They are the next generation of University students, polititions and parents.

But today they live in fear and the adults don’t seem to care. The fear is not just from gangsters in their colors parading the streets looking for victims or driving around in their cars looking to jump one or a few unsuspecting young males but it is the females who males normally wouldn’t fear because they are not supposed to be able to harm as bad as a male. But these women have no fear, no consequenses to keep them accountalbe and they have knives in their bags ready and waiting for the opportune moment. And the boys know they are powerless to the females.

Only last week I sat at a train station with around 20 other adults listening to 3 teenage girls in high school uniforms loudly discussing how they punch and kick males and one had stabbed a young man, got caught but with no real consequense. How ugly these girls looked to me but then to them it was all one big joke and nothing to be ashamed of for they were proud and it was as if they had no shame to carry on infront of all the adults.

Just for a moment I will tell of even the younger generation. While sitting at the library, I saw and heard a lovely librarian female walk up to a 9 year old boy who was using the computer and asked if he needed some help. He turned to her and said, “You can’t assualt me.”

Little does this young man know of his future from 3 years on.

What is going on??????

Thu 19th October 2006

Tax Free Volunteers.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 12:35 am

Mr Dunne released a discussion document setting out options, including a possible initiative to recognise the work of volunteers by giving them a tax rebate as well.

The document suggests rewarding volunteers for their time by setting a nominal hourly rate which they could use to claim a tax rebate.


Family Violence Courts.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 12:10 am

Link to Bad News.

Hit the link, scroll down to legal issues, listen, pray, then imagine the goal posts fading into the distance.

Yes they have done it again, the girls have changed the rules.

Wed 18th October 2006

Above the bottom line.

Filed under: General — Downunder @ 2:20 pm

For some reason I can’t make comments on Menz, so I will post this, because I it is important to teach society what the individual reality is. It was intended as a comment to the bottom line.

I remember writing a comment a while back to this effect. When you look at what a person describes, ask yourself where it happened. In the home, in a lawyer’s office, in the family court, at a Police Station, an IRD admin review and so on. The operative word here is isolated: without an audience, in secret, away from the public eye, without a process of accountability. It is an invisible wall in society that is as real as the Berlin wall, and probably twice as effective, because it is transparent but so many people still can’t see through it.

Feminism has hidden its foot soldiers in the noblest of professions. We just have trouble accepting that the people we would normally trust can often be a ruthless enemy.

Tue 17th October 2006

men’s rights sites blocked

Filed under: General — Julie @ 9:31 am

If you ever get a chance to use any of the public library’s computers around New Zealand that are free for public use you will notice that you can research anything on women’s rights and have access to any site but men’s right’s sites are being blocked as inappropriate.

I wonder where else this is happening?

Mon 16th October 2006

Dalziel and Women’s Refuge

Filed under: Domestic Violence,General — Downunder @ 8:28 pm

Scoop article

quoting Dalziel

I understand that you are also very close to concluding (or recently have concluded) a two-year contract with the Ministry of Social Development, which will give you certainty about ongoing core funding. The challenge though is to ensure that funding levels remain realistic over time.

It wasn’t the justification I was pointing out it was the 2 year funding contract from the government. What also concerns me is that the new charities commission having the power to deregister charities for political intent. If you don’t suit the politics of the day we will deregister you, if you suit the politics of the day we will fund you.

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